Chapters (83)
- Cover
- Title Page
- ALSO BY ROBERT MUCHAMORE
- PART ONE
- 1 SLASHED RUBBER
- 2 NOT HARRY POTTER
- 3 A THOUSAND BUCKS
- 4 SOFIA SILVER
- 5 DEL TACO
- 6 RAINBOW ROAD
- 7 BEAUTIFUL FREAK
- 8 CHEESY BALLS
- 9 DAZED AND CONFUSED
- 10 NEW-BABY SMELL
- 11 GOON SQUAD
- 12 ONE-LEGGED GRANNIES
- PART TWO
- 13 SNor
- 14 GOOD LUCK, CHARLIE
- 15 BEEF AND COKE
- 16 CHEF CHANNING
- 17 MAD BOMBER
- 18 BLOODSHOT
- 19 MANSPLAINING
- 20 NAPALM DROPS
- 21 BETSY & MEL
- 22 TERRIBLE TRIO
- 23 VICE PRINCIPAL
- 24 HOT OR NOT
- 25 JUICE JET
- 26 LANA’S TINY FEET
- 27 SEXY TOAST
- 28 COLGATE CHEST
- 29 TEACHERS ARE DICKS
- 30 DEVELOPMENT KITCHEN B
- 31 D IN MATH
- 32 BLOODY LOVE SCIENCE
- 33 EARLY BIRD
- 34 PATIENT Q
- 35 ALL A BIT CRUMMY
- 36 SAMURAI COP II
- 37 DIRTY SHAKE
- PART THREE
- 38 FREE FLOOR MATS
- 39 BREAKING BAD
- 40 LOVE SHACK
- 41 INDUSTRIAL RELATIONS
- 42 ONE-ONE-SEVEN
- 43 KILLER-T
- 44 SPOILED BRATS
- 45 BACK TAXIS
- 46 DEAD BIRTHDAY
- 47 TEAM MANGO
- 48 TWELVE-PIECE BUCKET
- 49 CLYDE’S DONGFENG
- 50 HAVING WORDS
- 51 BOUNCING BOYS
- 52 ZOMBIE SMASH
- 53 OLIVE PALM DRIVE
- 54 IGNITION
- 55 BUST
- PART FOUR
- 56 DEAD BUGS
- 57 ONE-POINT-SIX BILLION
- 58 PEER PRESSURE
- 59 GREEN FINGERS
- 60 TERATOMA TUMORS
- 61 WHIPPED CREAM
- 62 LIVING HIGH
- 63 MONEY, MONEY, MONEY
- 64 CARDBOARD THE PIG
- 65 BUBBLEGUM
- 66 BIG ONION
- 67 FAMILY REUNION
- 68 UNSEEN POTENTIAL
- PART FIVE
- 69 STONE DEAD
- 70 NO MODS ALLOWED
- 71 THE ACCOUNTS
- 72 SISTER MIRACULOUS
- 73 SLEIGHT OF HAND
- PART SIX
- 74 HARRY II
‘I said I’d handle this,’ Steve snapped. Then looked back at Charlie, shaking his head apologetically. ‘Makers Yard has an inclusivity policy. We encourage people of all ages, races and genders to join. However, these premises are provided free of charge by the Swallow Park Community Association, which retains the right to exclude anyone if they choose to.’
The skinny ginger guy stepped round the desk and handed Charlie a printed letter on Swallow Park Community Association letterhead.
‘This notice excludes you from all communal facilities and from entering Swallow Park, unless you are an invited guest of a property owner visiting their private home. Failure to respect this notice will result—’
‘Why?’ Charlie yelled. ‘What did I ever do to you?’
A mom in yoga pants came storming across from the lounge area, wagging her chubby finger. ‘You got suspended from Clayton Street after less than three days. You smashed my daughter’s eight-hundred-dollar phone and ripped out her best friend’s fingernail like some savage beast!’
‘Ask the school for the CCTV from the lunch room,’ Charlie spat back. ‘Look and see who was going after who.’
‘We want that phone money,’ the mom added. ‘You’ll be hearing from our family lawyer.’
‘Sue me,’ Charlie said, disgusted. ‘But I don’t have a cent. And when your darling daughter’s phone gets fixed, be sure to look at the last photo she took. The one where her two pals smile while their spit runs down my face.’
‘If they spat in your face, you gave them reason,’ the mom snarled.
‘Ya don’t gotta to listen to this brat’s nonsense, Terri,’ the big Texan said cheerfully. ‘It’s time to shut her up and ship her out.’
Charlie looked around, to sour faces and jeers. She felt sorry for Steve, who was the only one taking her side.
‘I’m friendly with the guys who run two other maker communities in Las Vegas,’ Steve said as he led Charlie away. ‘I’m going to call them on your behalf, because this is not the spirit in which maker communities are supposed to operate.’
Charlie was angry, but knew she’d book her one-way ticket to White Boulder if she kicked off and the cops showed up.
‘I’d resign my position if I thought it would make a difference,’ Steve said.
‘Might vote you off at the next committee meeting anyway,’ the Texan sneered from behind. ‘You’re making a fool of yourself.’
‘Vote me off, you dumb redneck,’ Steve said, grinning like a loon. ‘Take my unpaid job. See what it’s like when you’re the one who locks and unlocks, sterilises bathrooms, mops floors and unblocks the dust extractors. And I’ll carp over the way you run things.’
As Steve and the Texan shot daggers across the room, Charlie shook her head and backed away.