Chapters (83)
- Cover
- Title Page
- ALSO BY ROBERT MUCHAMORE
- PART ONE
- 1 SLASHED RUBBER
- 2 NOT HARRY POTTER
- 3 A THOUSAND BUCKS
- 4 SOFIA SILVER
- 5 DEL TACO
- 6 RAINBOW ROAD
- 7 BEAUTIFUL FREAK
- 8 CHEESY BALLS
- 9 DAZED AND CONFUSED
- 10 NEW-BABY SMELL
- 11 GOON SQUAD
- 12 ONE-LEGGED GRANNIES
- PART TWO
- 13 SNor
- 14 GOOD LUCK, CHARLIE
- 15 BEEF AND COKE
- 16 CHEF CHANNING
- 17 MAD BOMBER
- 18 BLOODSHOT
- 19 MANSPLAINING
- 20 NAPALM DROPS
- 21 BETSY & MEL
- 22 TERRIBLE TRIO
- 23 VICE PRINCIPAL
- 24 HOT OR NOT
- 25 JUICE JET
- 26 LANA’S TINY FEET
- 27 SEXY TOAST
- 28 COLGATE CHEST
- 29 TEACHERS ARE DICKS
- 30 DEVELOPMENT KITCHEN B
- 31 D IN MATH
- 32 BLOODY LOVE SCIENCE
- 33 EARLY BIRD
- 34 PATIENT Q
- 35 ALL A BIT CRUMMY
- 36 SAMURAI COP II
- 37 DIRTY SHAKE
- PART THREE
- 38 FREE FLOOR MATS
- 39 BREAKING BAD
- 40 LOVE SHACK
- 41 INDUSTRIAL RELATIONS
- 42 ONE-ONE-SEVEN
- 43 KILLER-T
- 44 SPOILED BRATS
- 45 BACK TAXIS
- 46 DEAD BIRTHDAY
- 47 TEAM MANGO
- 48 TWELVE-PIECE BUCKET
- 49 CLYDE’S DONGFENG
- 50 HAVING WORDS
- 51 BOUNCING BOYS
- 52 ZOMBIE SMASH
- 53 OLIVE PALM DRIVE
- 54 IGNITION
- 55 BUST
- PART FOUR
- 56 DEAD BUGS
- 57 ONE-POINT-SIX BILLION
- 58 PEER PRESSURE
- 59 GREEN FINGERS
- 60 TERATOMA TUMORS
- 61 WHIPPED CREAM
- 62 LIVING HIGH
- 63 MONEY, MONEY, MONEY
- 64 CARDBOARD THE PIG
- 65 BUBBLEGUM
- 66 BIG ONION
- 67 FAMILY REUNION
- 68 UNSEEN POTENTIAL
- PART FIVE
- 69 STONE DEAD
- 70 NO MODS ALLOWED
- 71 THE ACCOUNTS
- 72 SISTER MIRACULOUS
- 73 SLEIGHT OF HAND
- PART SIX
- 74 HARRY II
‘Keep your nose out and keep your balls,’ Man Bun said. ‘And your auntie, the la-de-da chef? We’ll work her over too. Understood?’
‘Understood,’ Harry moaned as Man Bun let go and the little guy shoved him violently off the cleaning cart.
The goons backed out as Harry crashed into empty chemical drums, tears streaking his face, sure he was about to pass out from the pain.
• • •
Harry snuck into the apartment, back pain, rib pain and half doubled over. Kirsten would freak if she knew he’d been beaten up, so he was grateful that she was up in her room, and that she’d left for a meeting at her restaurant when he emerged from a hot soak.
The pain was mild as Harry hobbled downstairs, but his nerves were fried. He half expected the goons to crash through the door, and jerked with fright when a kid squealed in the communal pool outside.
Harry strapped an ice pack to his back and listened to a message Ellie had left while he was out. The take from the video and photos was now thirty-one grand, but thinking about his share made him feel shitty because it was earned at Charlie’s expense.
There was another call as he read the instructions on an Ibuprofen bottle.
‘Harry,’ Charlie said.
The phone felt like molten lava.
‘Harry, are you there?’
What if this is a test. Will the bad guys come back if they know I spoke to her?
‘Hey,’ Harry said warily.
‘You sound off,’ Charlie said.
‘I’m good,’ Harry said, unthinkingly trying to sit on a kitchen stool and getting a jolt of pain.
‘My call last night? It doesn’t matter now. I signed my life away. Felony assault and two charges of manufacturing an explosive device. I’ll be out in two years if I behave. JJ gets to be quarterback, Fawn gets her annoying sister off her back. At least I’m not one of the poor saps who got half their skin burnt off.’
Harry acted like he was speaking to bad guys listening to a recording, instead of to Charlie. ‘I didn’t take any steps to investigate,’ he said stiltedly.
Charlie sounded sore. ‘Thanks for the sympathy, pal.’
‘I …’
Harry’s head was all over the place. He was keen to help Charlie, but getting jumped had turned him into a wreck.
‘I’m sorry this is so messed up,’ he said.
‘I should never have dragged you into this,’ Charlie said slowly. ‘I just wanted you to know it’s over. Have a nice life, Harry.’
‘Wait,’ Harry said. ‘Don’t go.’
Part of him was terrified of what might happen if he stayed involved, but Charlie needed him. And though they’d never had a normal conversation he’d felt a connection when they hugged.