Back Killer T
Chapters (83)
  1. Cover
  2. Title Page
  3. ALSO BY ROBERT MUCHAMORE
  4. PART ONE
  5. 1 SLASHED RUBBER
  6. 2 NOT HARRY POTTER
  7. 3 A THOUSAND BUCKS
  8. 4 SOFIA SILVER
  9. 5 DEL TACO
  10. 6 RAINBOW ROAD
  11. 7 BEAUTIFUL FREAK
  12. 8 CHEESY BALLS
  13. 9 DAZED AND CONFUSED
  14. 10 NEW-BABY SMELL
  15. 11 GOON SQUAD
  16. 12 ONE-LEGGED GRANNIES
  17. PART TWO
  18. 13 SNor
  19. 14 GOOD LUCK, CHARLIE
  20. 15 BEEF AND COKE
  21. 16 CHEF CHANNING
  22. 17 MAD BOMBER
  23. 18 BLOODSHOT
  24. 19 MANSPLAINING
  25. 20 NAPALM DROPS
  26. 21 BETSY & MEL
  27. 22 TERRIBLE TRIO
  28. 23 VICE PRINCIPAL
  29. 24 HOT OR NOT
  30. 25 JUICE JET
  31. 26 LANA’S TINY FEET
  32. 27 SEXY TOAST
  33. 28 COLGATE CHEST
  34. 29 TEACHERS ARE DICKS
  35. 30 DEVELOPMENT KITCHEN B
  36. 31 D IN MATH
  37. 32 BLOODY LOVE SCIENCE
  38. 33 EARLY BIRD
  39. 34 PATIENT Q
  40. 35 ALL A BIT CRUMMY
  41. 36 SAMURAI COP II
  42. 37 DIRTY SHAKE
  43. PART THREE
  44. 38 FREE FLOOR MATS
  45. 39 BREAKING BAD
  46. 40 LOVE SHACK
  47. 41 INDUSTRIAL RELATIONS
  48. 42 ONE-ONE-SEVEN
  49. 43 KILLER-T
  50. 44 SPOILED BRATS
  51. 45 BACK TAXIS
  52. 46 DEAD BIRTHDAY
  53. 47 TEAM MANGO
  54. 48 TWELVE-PIECE BUCKET
  55. 49 CLYDE’S DONGFENG
  56. 50 HAVING WORDS
  57. 51 BOUNCING BOYS
  58. 52 ZOMBIE SMASH
  59. 53 OLIVE PALM DRIVE
  60. 54 IGNITION
  61. 55 BUST
  62. PART FOUR
  63. 56 DEAD BUGS
  64. 57 ONE-POINT-SIX BILLION
  65. 58 PEER PRESSURE
  66. 59 GREEN FINGERS
  67. 60 TERATOMA TUMORS
  68. 61 WHIPPED CREAM
  69. 62 LIVING HIGH
  70. 63 MONEY, MONEY, MONEY
  71. 64 CARDBOARD THE PIG
  72. 65 BUBBLEGUM
  73. 66 BIG ONION
  74. 67 FAMILY REUNION
  75. 68 UNSEEN POTENTIAL
  76. PART FIVE
  77. 69 STONE DEAD
  78. 70 NO MODS ALLOWED
  79. 71 THE ACCOUNTS
  80. 72 SISTER MIRACULOUS
  81. 73 SLEIGHT OF HAND
  82. PART SIX
  83. 74 HARRY II

The custody officer left wordlessly as Charlie settled on a spongy office chair, cuffs scraping the desktop. The only light was a triangle from a side door, where she could hear piss spraying into a toilet bowl. Charlie heard the faucet run, hands getting dried, then a gong crash from the lid of a pedal bin.

‘Charlie Croker,’ a stooped figure said as he came out, silhouetted by the washroom light.

He was bulky, with a man bun, biker jacket and stubble. Blue cop car light flashed the dark office walls as he settled across the desk.

‘How’s your day been?’

‘Had better,’ Charlie said as she tried to place the voice. ‘Are you JJ’s lawyer, Edelmann?’

‘Well recognised,’ he said, casually drumming a fountain pen he’d taken off the desk. ‘Not my actual name.’

‘Man of mystery,’ Charlie said, stifling a yawn as one of her disposable slippers dropped off. ‘I’m guessing you’re not a lawyer either.’

‘That would be a smart guess,’ he said, jamming the pen in his ear then studying the blob of wax stuck to the end. ‘I describe myself as a person that can fix things in this town. For instance, I can arrive at a police station at three in the morning and get a suspect taken from her cell for a private chat. And when you look at the custody log in the morning it won’t be written down. And if you ask around nobody’s gonna remember a damned thing.’

‘Is that the same guy who hacked my laptop and put Deion’s shirts under my bed?’ Charlie asked.

‘And slipped your brother the laxative, so you couldn’t leave the trailer,’ he said, clicking his fingers. ‘Don’t get your hopes up about data recovery on the Rock Spring High CCTV, either.’

Feeling vulnerable in the paper suit with nothing underneath, Charlie pulled one knee up to her chest and wrapped her cuffed hands round it.

‘Are you working for my sister?’ she asked warily.

‘If I were in your shoes, I wouldn’t be gifting Fawn this Christmas,’ he smiled. ‘But my services come above her price bracket.’

‘Jay Janssen Senior?’

‘Do you think?’ the mystery man said, but nodded as well.

‘So two people half burnt to death and my life gets wrecked, all so some rich guy gets to see his son play starting quarterback?’

He stroked his man bun and smiled. ‘Crazy messed-up world we live in.’

‘But you’re here at three a.m.,’ Charlie said thoughtfully. ‘Haven’t you got me already?’

‘Got you for sure, Charlie girl,’ he said. ‘But I sleep better when all the loose ends are tidied away. And Fawn said she wanted your wings clipped, rather than lock you up and toss the key.’

‘Isn’t that nice …’ Charlie said.