Erin, age 14

When you’re a teenager, you’re changing, growing and learning all the time… and that means love just doesn’t last forever. Handling break-ups is a part of the learning process.

Alice knows she has to end this relationship – the longer she lets things drag on, the harder it will be. A quick, clean break will mean less hurt in the long run. Alice should find a quiet place to talk to her boyfriend, and explain, kindly but firmly, that although she likes him as a friend, things aren’t going to go any further than that.

If you ever need to finish a relationship, always do it in person. Never let a friend do it for you, or be tempted to do it by text, phone or email. You owe it to your soon-to-be ex to be honest and direct – treat him the way you’d like to be treated if things were the other way around.

It may be hard to end a relationship, but being dumped is harder still. Like Erin, you may still care about your ex and find it hard to understand why things have ended. Erin feels she must be in some way to blame, but the chances are that the relationship has simply run its course. Her ex has moved on – and now she must too.

So how do you get over a break-up? Remember the good times, but don’t forget the bad times too… if things had been perfect, it wouldn’t have ended like this. Feel sad – feel angry if you need to – and then move on. It’s an ending, sure, but also the beginning of something new perhaps! Stay busy with friends, family, school and fun… don’t feel sorry for yourself. No relationship is a waste of time – you learn from every one of them, even if you get your fingers burnt.

Helpbox

Read It…

• Think Pink by Lisa Clark (Macmillan) – has a fab section on boys
• The Trouble With Boyfriends by Tricia Kreitman (Piccadilly)

Cathy’s Books… Published by Puffin

• GingerSnaps – when your best friend doesn’t approve of the boy you like…
• Angel Cake – falling for a bad boy… and finding that your love rival is the school mean-girl…
• Scarlett – cool, mysterious, kind… is Kian too good to be true?
• Dizzy – can a boy mate become a boyfriend?
• Sundae Girl – Carter is annoying, clumsy, loyal, persistent – and seriously romantic…
• Lucky Star – a boy from a rough high-rise estate and a girl from the posh side of town – what happens when opposites attract!
• Driftwood – when the boy you like doesn’t seem to feel the same…

4. School Daze

Schooldays are the best days of your life? Er, right… whoever thought up that little phrase clearly hadn’t been inside a classroom for some time! School can be cool, but more often it’s just plain hard work – and not just in class, either.