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Back Suzy Suzy Save as PDF
Chapters (90)
  1. Cover
  2. By the same author
  3. SUZY SUZY
  4. Copyright
  5. Contents
  6. Glossary of Dialect Terms
  7. 1
  8. 2
  9. 3
  10. 4
  11. 5
  12. 6
  13. 7
  14. 8
  15. 9
  16. 10
  17. 11
  18. 12
  19. 13
  20. 14
  21. 15
  22. 16
  23. 17
  24. 18
  25. 19
  26. 20
  27. 21
  28. 22
  29. 23
  30. 24
  31. 25
  32. 26
  33. 27
  34. 28
  35. 29
  36. 30
  37. 31
  38. 32
  39. 33
  40. 34
  41. 35
  42. 36
  43. 37
  44. 38
  45. 39
  46. 40
  47. 41
  48. 42
  49. 43
  50. 44
  51. 45
  52. 46
  53. 47
  54. 48
  55. 49
  56. 50
  57. 51
  58. 52
  59. 53
  60. 54
  61. 55
  62. 56
  63. 57
  64. 58
  65. 59
  66. 60
  67. 61
  68. 62
  69. 63
  70. 64
  71. 65
  72. 66
  73. 67
  74. 68
  75. 69
  76. 70
  77. 71
  78. 72
  79. 73
  80. 74
  81. 75
  82. 76
  83. 77
  84. 78
  85. 79
  86. 80
  87. 81
  88. 82
  89. About William Wall
  90. An Invitation from the Publisher

After that we were brought into a room and sat at a table exactly like on telly and the man and a woman guard came in and that was where we made our statements. I did the talking except every now and then I’d say, Right, Serena? And Serena would say, Right. In the middle, it was so embarrassing, my brother’s phone ass-called me and I was like, Hello? Hello? Tony your phone is ass-calling me? Then I hung up and it called again. The guard asked me to turn it off. The woman guard wrote everything down. Maybe she even wrote down that I was ass-called twice. Every now and then she stopped and asked me to repeat something or slow down. The man asked the questions. When I got to the light coming on and I said I saw Tom Bowles and the housekeeper, he stopped me.

Do you know that or do you believe it?

That was an interesting question. I said I knew it and I believed it. But I said I supposed you could believe something and not know it, or you could know something and not believe it. Like once I remember I crushed a glass in my hand and cut myself and I said, I don’t fucking believe this. And I didn’t believe it for like three seconds.

That’s enough, the man said. Just carry on.

So then I got to legging it and getting home. I didn’t mention that Serena wasn’t with me. And I told them how my dad and mam were awake because of the alarm going off and how they nearly gutted me. And the man said to the woman guard, We could check with the alarm company.

Then they checked on things like What Were Our Names And Addresses, Were We Sure About The Time and What We Observed and Whether We Were Sure About Seeing Mr Bowles?

And then they asked us why did we set fire to the Ballyshane recycling bin and I just couldn’t think of an answer. And after a few seconds I realised Serena was pointing at me. And then she said, still pointing at me, It was her idea, she’s like a pyromaniac. And I said that was a lie. And Serena said, Cross my heart and swear to die it was Suzy’s idea. And I said, I don’t fucking believe this. And after a few more rounds of that the guards told us just sign the statements and get lost.

We signed. I don’t know about Serena but I felt like a character in Cracker or Rebus. It was fab. Like even being a character who was sold out by her best friend. Or one of her friends anyway. It was still fab. Holly was going to be mad jealous.