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Chapters (90)
  1. Cover
  2. By the same author
  3. SUZY SUZY
  4. Copyright
  5. Contents
  6. Glossary of Dialect Terms
  7. 1
  8. 2
  9. 3
  10. 4
  11. 5
  12. 6
  13. 7
  14. 8
  15. 9
  16. 10
  17. 11
  18. 12
  19. 13
  20. 14
  21. 15
  22. 16
  23. 17
  24. 18
  25. 19
  26. 20
  27. 21
  28. 22
  29. 23
  30. 24
  31. 25
  32. 26
  33. 27
  34. 28
  35. 29
  36. 30
  37. 31
  38. 32
  39. 33
  40. 34
  41. 35
  42. 36
  43. 37
  44. 38
  45. 39
  46. 40
  47. 41
  48. 42
  49. 43
  50. 44
  51. 45
  52. 46
  53. 47
  54. 48
  55. 49
  56. 50
  57. 51
  58. 52
  59. 53
  60. 54
  61. 55
  62. 56
  63. 57
  64. 58
  65. 59
  66. 60
  67. 61
  68. 62
  69. 63
  70. 64
  71. 65
  72. 66
  73. 67
  74. 68
  75. 69
  76. 70
  77. 71
  78. 72
  79. 73
  80. 74
  81. 75
  82. 76
  83. 77
  84. 78
  85. 79
  86. 80
  87. 81
  88. 82
  89. About William Wall
  90. An Invitation from the Publisher

He walked past me and out and carefully closed the bathroom door behind him. I opened it again and I was just in time to see him closing his bedroom door. What just happened? Did my dad actually talk to me? Whatever he said, I didn’t understand it. Maybe people in my family are talking all the time but I just don’t have whatever you need to get it? I heard him getting into the bed. The frame creaks. Then silence. If I waited long enough, if I didn’t freeze to death standing there, I would hear him snoring. I waited a while and then I went back into the bathroom and picked up the broken glass. It was the mouthwash. I cleaned the toothbrushes in case there were glass bits. I went to bed. I was shaking.

Like in English we’re always supposed to Watch Out For The Turning Point. It’s a big deal. But mostly in real life you’ve already turned. Nobody remembers when there was a signpost or just a crossroads or even any other way. Or even if. And it’s just everything is different but also the same in a weird way. Like I wanted to be a doctor when I was in Third Year and I went to this lecture by a guy whose job it was to inject cancer cells into mice. He was saying how you could tag the cells with dye so the tumours would be easy to find. And halfway through the lecture I realised that I already didn’t want to be a doctor and that I didn’t want to be one for a long time before I came. I couldn’t work out when it started. I didn’t want to see slides of coloured mouse cancers. I hate mice tbh. But I wouldn’t vote to give them cancer if there was a referendum on cancer for mice. Like, I’m. Just. Not. Going. There.

I got out early. I told my teacher I was feeling sick.

But that night was a Turning Point. And I knew it even before I fell asleep. I texted Holly. I think my dad is gonna kill himself. She didn’t reply. She was probably asleep. I texted again later. I don’t know what to do I’m scared. It was probably one a.m. By two the rain was over and the wind was going down. I dozed off and woke some time later and the wind was gone. I could hear the sea falling on the rocks. I could hear my dad snoring. So I knew he wasn’t dead. I fell asleep again.