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Chapters (90)
  1. Cover
  2. By the same author
  3. SUZY SUZY
  4. Copyright
  5. Contents
  6. Glossary of Dialect Terms
  7. 1
  8. 2
  9. 3
  10. 4
  11. 5
  12. 6
  13. 7
  14. 8
  15. 9
  16. 10
  17. 11
  18. 12
  19. 13
  20. 14
  21. 15
  22. 16
  23. 17
  24. 18
  25. 19
  26. 20
  27. 21
  28. 22
  29. 23
  30. 24
  31. 25
  32. 26
  33. 27
  34. 28
  35. 29
  36. 30
  37. 31
  38. 32
  39. 33
  40. 34
  41. 35
  42. 36
  43. 37
  44. 38
  45. 39
  46. 40
  47. 41
  48. 42
  49. 43
  50. 44
  51. 45
  52. 46
  53. 47
  54. 48
  55. 49
  56. 50
  57. 51
  58. 52
  59. 53
  60. 54
  61. 55
  62. 56
  63. 57
  64. 58
  65. 59
  66. 60
  67. 61
  68. 62
  69. 63
  70. 64
  71. 65
  72. 66
  73. 67
  74. 68
  75. 69
  76. 70
  77. 71
  78. 72
  79. 73
  80. 74
  81. 75
  82. 76
  83. 77
  84. 78
  85. 79
  86. 80
  87. 81
  88. 82
  89. About William Wall
  90. An Invitation from the Publisher

So, we went to a birthday party. We didn’t know it would be a free gaff and the boys would all be tanked. It was bad. Like I mean bad idk very bad. We didn’t know any of them. They had stuff in small bottles. One of them had a hip flask. Serena danced me first and then Holly and then Serena danced the boy with the hip flask and then they disappeared. Another boy danced me and he was all hands. I had to tell him to take his hands off my arse. He was not a happy camper. He went off in a sulk in the middle of the number. I saw him talking to other boys and looking at me. I made up my mind to stick with Holly for the rest of the night. I didn’t want to find myself upstairs with a gang of them. I wanted to go home but we couldn’t go without Serena. It was Serena was invited. Two boys asked me to go outside. One after the other. No fucking way. They were those big guys, like rugby or something, with necks like those long balloons you see. I don’t even like that kind of body. And they’re generally stupid too. I told the second guy I was underage and he started to laugh like it was a joke.

About an hour later Serena turned up again and she said she wanted to go home. Holly and I were just beginning to enjoy ourselves, we were dancing together, and we were idk pissed about it or something, because we said no, she’d have to wait. So she went somewhere. And at eleven thirty the birthday girl’s parents came home unexpectedly and that was really the end of that, even though some of us stayed around for a bit to be polite. Holly said they were proper buffers. It was all young lady this and young lady that. So then we had to call somebody’s dad to come and collect us and Serena’s dad was on call so he couldn’t come. And so it ended up that Holly’s dad came out for us in his ancient Toyota. Serena said the car smelled of dog shit. She didn’t want to get in. I don’t think Holly heard. Holly was telling her dad about the guys with the naggins of whiskey. Then she said about the guy with the hip flask and her Dad said something I didn’t hear and Holly laughed and Serena leaned against me and whispered in my ear, I was upstairs with him, I let him do it. I said, Did you use anything? She said, I think he loves me. I said, Did he say that before or after?