Chapters (116)
- Title Page
- Copyright Notice
- Dedication
- PART 1
- 1. Angst
- 2. Angst and the Journey
- 3. A Girl Is Mildly Traumatized
- 4. A Girl Is Off to Colorado, Apparently
- 5. Angst and Socializing
- 6. A Girl Is Here for the Introspection
- 7. Angst and the Shower Girl
- 8.???
- 9. Angst and Fishing
- 10. A Girl Is Sampling Sisterhood
- 11. Angst and Swimming
- 12. Is a Girl Alive?
- 13. Angst and All-Consuming Confusion
- 14. A Girl Is Clammy
- 15. Angst and Older Sisters
- 16. A Girl Has Been Caught Off Guard
- 17. Angst and Flashbacks
- 18. A Girl Is Trying to Reconnect
- 19. Angst and Reprocessing
- 20. A Girl Is a Little Disoriented
- 21. Angst and Hypothetical Miracles
- 22. A Girl Is Not Doing That
- 23. Angst and Fire Choir
- 24. A Girl Is Rapt with Attention
- 25. Angst and Metal
- PART 2
- 26. A Girl Is Playing the Long Game
- 27. Angst and Hikes
- 28. A Girl Thinks This Pitch Is Going Well
- 29. Angst and Saying Yes
- 30. A Girl Is on Her Ass
- 31. Angst and Cellular Device Access
- 32. Angst and Goodbyes
- 33. A Girl Is on a Plane
- 34. Angst and the Middle Seat
- 35. A Girl Doesn’t Understand Your Compliment
- 36. Angst and LAX
- 37. A Girl Is Going to Implode if Siri Keeps Ignoring Her Calls
- 38. A Girl Has Never Been to Her Mom’s House
- 39. Angst and Salons
- 40. A Girl Appreciates a Donut
- 41. Angst and Jamie’s Room
- 42. Angst and Dad
- 43. A Girl Can Rock a Catfish
- 44. Angst and Rom-Coms
- 45. A Girl Needs Adventure
- 46. Angst and Improv Practice
- 47. A Girl Fancies Zarar
- 48. Angst and Empathy
- 49. A Girl Is Questioning Everything
- 50. Angst and Pizza Hangs
- 51. A Girl Is Taking All the Calls
- 52. Angst and Good/Bad News
- 53. Angst and Preparation
- 54. A Girl Needs to Do Better
- 55. A Girl Is on Time for Once
- 56. Angst and Emails
- 57. A Girl Gets Feedback
- 58. Angst and Expectations
- 59. A Girl Is on the Train Again
- 60. Angst and a Barbecue
- 61. A Girl Does Family Dinner
- 62. A Girl Is Braving Another Open Mic
- 63. Angst and Ice Cream
- 64. A Girl Needs a Break
- 65. Angst and Vulnerability
- 66. A Girl Is at a Rooftop Soiree
- 67. Angst and Ideas
- 68. A Girl Is Conflicted
- 69. Angst and Storytime
- 70. A Girl Is Inferior
- 71. Angst and Preparations
- 72. A Girl Meets a Family
- 73. A Girl Has Lost Control
- 74. A Girl Is a Hot Mess
- PART 3
- 75. Angst and Road Trips
- 76. A Girl Is Running on Fumes
- 77. Angst and Recall
- 78. A Girl Is Having Trouble with This
- 79. Angst and Resolve
- 80. Angst and Confrontation
- 81. A Girl Is Hanging with Her Family!
- 82. A Girl’s Head Is Spinning
- 83. A Girl Ruined Everything
- 84. Angst and Intervention
- 85. A Girl Is Not Sure How to Proceed
- 86. Angst and Support
- 87. A Girl Has Some Work to Do
- 88. Angst and Progress
- 89. A Girl Isn’t Tired
- 90. Angst and Birthdays
- 91. A Girl Is Voluntarily Here
- 92. A Girl Wants to Make It Better
- 93. Angst and Letting Go
- 94. A Girl Works a Meeting
- 95. Angst and Wine
- 96. A Girl Is Enjoying Herself
- 97. Angst and Bridges
- 98. A Girl Is Going for It
- 99. Angst and Los Angeles
- 100. Angst and Hope
- 101. A Girl Has One More Letter
- 102. A Girl Is Trying Again
- 103. Angst and Pride
- 104. A Girl Is Freaking Flying
- Epilogue
- JAMIE
- Acknowledgments
- Also by Christine Riccio
- About the Author
- Newsletter Sign-up
The doors slide closed and the car shoots upward. I slide my eyes sideways and wait for him to meet them. After a few seconds he does.
“Just so you know,” I say, “I am so turned on right now.”
His lip turns up. “Keep it in your pants, James, this is a business party.”
I’m smiling my ass off when the doors open.
There’s around thirty other people up here, chatting and drinking and being merry under the fairy lights strung over us all like a canopy of well-placed fireflies. Music slides among the guests, low enough that everyone can hear themselves talking, but loud enough that I can hear the song. Something soothing and calm that I don’t recognize.
I look to Z for direction. “What shall we do first? Go meet your people? Mingle? Eat? I see food over there. Or drink, I see a bar.”
“What would you like to do?”
I put my arm through his. “I would like to eat food and meet the people you work with. You need to network at these things, Zarar, not just hang out with me. Are they playing music the company produces?”
Zarar nods. “Yes, this is all from our artist list.”
I nod approvingly. “So cool.”
At the food table I load up on hummus dip, cucumbers, and sliders. The two of us huddle at a tiny standing table near the edge of the roof.
“So what is this for?” I ask as I stuff a hummus cucumber into my mouth.
“It’s the company’s anniversary; they hold a yearly rooftop party to celebrate. This is their ninth year in business, I think.”
“Hey, Zarar, you made it,” comes a warm voice behind me.
“Hey, Mr. Penn,” Zarar greets politely. I spin around to find an attractive white dude in a plaid shirt and jeans, severely lacking any of the stylish ease of Zarar. This guy can’t be the boss.
“Man, come on, we’re on a first-name basis. We go way back, and I’m barely older than you,” the guy replies.
“You’re seven years older than me, Mr. Penn.”
“Is this your boss?” I point to the guy and look at Zarar.
The guy looks at me. God, his eyes are freakishly sincere.
“I’m not his boss. I’m the guy he’s working with.”
“The guy that used to be in a band with his brother?” I ask. Oof. Something about the dude is familiar.
“That’s the one,” he confirms with a head bob.
“He’s my boss,” Zarar says through the side of his mouth with his equivalent of a smile.
I turn my smirk back on his boss. “How’s he doing?” I point my thumb back at Z.
“Oh my gosh, Zarar!” A blond woman with wild curls appears next to Mr. Penn. “Nice to meet you! I’ve heard you’re already doing such an amazing job.”