Papa shakes his head. “I love your mother, Siri, but that doesn’t mean I can’t keep a secret. I am here. I love you too.”

I know this man loves Siri, but I can’t … trust him. He’s complicit in my deletion from their life.

“Did Mom tell you I’m seeing Jamie again?” I ask plainly.

Papa pushes his lips together, and his expression evens out. Guarded. “Are you…?” He looks down at me over his glasses. “Really?”

I shake my head in disbelief. “I’m out of here.” I grab my bag and plow out the door without looking back.

It’s a fifteen-minute walk to the train station. I don’t feel like calling an Uber, so I set off down the road at a brisk pace.

This man who supposedly loves Siri, and should by default care about me, went along with Mara’s plan to completely write me out of her life. And now he has the audacity to question whether or not I’m lying?!

I stop short at the corner. My chest is tight. I slow down, moving with one hand at my throat, and one holding my hip, staring at the sidewalk.

You’re looking at this too personally. This can be funny. You just need to find your angle and put it into perspective. What is my angle?

I make my feet keep moving.

55. A Girl Is on Time for Once

JAMIE

September 5, Saturday Afternoon

New York City

“Tell me exactly what happened during your infamous stand-up performance,” Zarar requests as we stride down the sidewalk.

When I walked up to the diner exactly on time, Z was already there, leaning against it in his stylish leather jacket. Instead of going inside, we started down the block.

We cross an intersection. “Didn’t I tell you about this already at Rediscover?”

“No, you told me it happened and it shook the very foundations of your confidence, but you didn’t say what exactly happened.”

I make a move to shove my hands into my overall pockets and am again thrown to find only the smooth vacant emptiness of Siri’s black leggings. “What happened was I choked, forgot my set, stood on stage for a solid one hundred twenty seconds of awkward silence, threw up, got booed, was still convinced I could find some way to save it, and had to get escorted off by the manager, who I vaguely know because, surprise, I work there.”

Next to me, Zarar coughs a chuckle. I snap my gaze over to him as we navigate down another block.

“Zarar. Did you just laugh?” I ask, astounded. “You haven’t laughed in my presence since I met you.”

He coughs another chuckle. “I’m sorry, I don’t really laugh.”

“You don’t really laugh?” I say in disbelief. “I think you just did.”