‘My boss, Ross. Just once. I’ve been an idiot but I’ve lost a part of myself since I got married. Ross gave me a chance of reinvention. Adam knows me so well. Too well. He knows what I really want and… it’s been hard, you know? Watching him with your kids. He would have been an amazing dad.’

‘He will be an amazing dad.’

‘One day.’ I touched the wooden table for luck. ‘I’m so sorry we’ve drifted apart, Nell. I had no idea you weren’t happy either.’

‘The grass is greener and all that bollocks.’ Her eyes were red-rimmed, the same as mine must be. ‘I’ve missed you.’

‘I’ve missed you too.’ I opened my arms and we hugged for the longest time.

Later, Nell headed out in search of food, returning with plates piled high with egg and chips. ‘All that sharing has made me hungry. Though you could use some carbs and protein.’

After a few mouthfuls I put down my knife and fork but she encouraged me to keep eating, placing some egg onto my fork.

‘I might have to do this in the future,’ I said quietly.

‘What?’

‘Feed Adam, if he… if he wakes up and he isn’t the same.’

‘Don’t think like that. Bloody doctors always have to prepare you for the worst.’

Dejectedly, I pushed my plate away. Nell slid it back in front of me.

‘One more bit of egg, Anna,’ she said. ‘You need the nutrients. God, I’ve turned into my mother. Speaking of mothers…’

‘I know.’ I haven’t yet told mine what has happened. ‘I’ll ring her later. I haven’t been up to telling her, knowing she’ll cry and then I’ll cry.’

‘Yes. And then you’ll feel terrible that she’s so worried about you. But we do worry about you. I know Adam’s the one in the hospital bed but that’s just left you with all the practical worries and now you’ve told me about the baby—’

‘I’m not going to tell her about the miscarriage. Please don’t tell anyone. Do you think I should tell Adam while he’s…?’

‘Do you think he can hear you?’

‘I don’t know. I met a man earlier, Oliver Chapman from The Chapman Institute for Brain Science. He seems to think that if there’s anything going on inside Adam’s mind he can uncover it.’ I recounted our conversation.

‘Hmm. It might be worth hearing him out.’

‘Don’t you think it sounds a bit…’ I chewed the sore skin around my thumbnail. Should I have listened properly to Oliver? ‘I couldn’t take it in. I couldn’t make him out either. He seemed more uncomfortable than I was.’