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Chapters (100)
  1. Cover
  2. About the Author
  3. Note to Readers
  4. Dedication
  5. Prologue
  6. Part One
  7. Chapter One
  8. Chapter Two
  9. Chapter Three
  10. Chapter Four
  11. Chapter Five
  12. Chapter Six
  13. Chapter Seven
  14. Chapter Eight
  15. Chapter Nine
  16. Chapter Ten
  17. Chapter Eleven
  18. Chapter Twelve
  19. Chapter Thirteen
  20. Part Two
  21. Chapter Fourteen
  22. Chapter Fifteen
  23. Chapter Sixteen
  24. Chapter Seventeen
  25. Chapter Eighteen
  26. Chapter Nineteen
  27. Chapter Twenty
  28. Chapter Twenty-One
  29. Chapter Twenty-Two
  30. Chapter Twenty-Three
  31. Chapter Twenty-Four
  32. Chapter Twenty-Five
  33. Chapter Twenty-Six
  34. Part Three
  35. Chapter Twenty-Seven
  36. Chapter Twenty-Eight
  37. Chapter Twenty-Nine
  38. Chapter Thirty
  39. Chapter Thirty-One
  40. Chapter Thirty-Two
  41. Chapter Thirty-Three
  42. Chapter Thirty-Four
  43. Chapter Thirty-Five
  44. Chapter Thirty-Six
  45. Part Four
  46. Chapter Thirty-Seven
  47. Chapter Thirty-Eight
  48. Chapter Thirty-Nine
  49. Chapter Forty
  50. Chapter Forty-One
  51. Chapter Forty-Two
  52. Chapter Forty-Three
  53. Chapter Forty-Four
  54. Chapter Forty-Five
  55. Chapter Forty-Six
  56. Chapter Forty-Seven
  57. Chapter Forty-Eight
  58. Chapter Forty-Nine
  59. Chapter Fifty
  60. Chapter Fifty-One
  61. Chapter Fifty-Two
  62. Chapter Fifty-Three
  63. Chapter Fifty-Four
  64. Chapter Fifty-Five
  65. Chapter Fifty-Six
  66. Chapter Fifty-Seven
  67. Chapter Fifty-Eight
  68. Chapter Fifty-Nine
  69. Chapter Sixty
  70. Chapter Sixty-One
  71. Chapter Sixty-Two
  72. Chapter Sixty-Three
  73. Chapter Sixty-Four
  74. Chapter Sixty-Five
  75. Chapter Sixty-Six
  76. Chapter Sixty-Seven
  77. Chapter Sixty-Eight
  78. Chapter Sixty-Nine
  79. Chapter Seventy
  80. Chapter Seventy-One
  81. Chapter Seventy-Two
  82. Chapter Seventy-Three
  83. Chapter Seventy-Four
  84. Chapter Seventy-Five
  85. Chapter Seventy-Six
  86. Part Five
  87. Chapter Seventy-Seven
  88. Chapter Seventy-Eight
  89. Chapter Seventy-Nine
  90. Chapter Eighty
  91. Part Six
  92. Chapter Eighty-One
  93. Chapter Eighty-Two
  94. Chapter Eighty-Three
  95. Author’s Note
  96. Book Club Questions for The Life We Almost Had
  97. Acknowledgements
  98. Extract
  99. Chapter One
  100. About the Publisher

Oliver wondered what they would think if they saw him living this way. They would likely take some pleasure in his empty fridge, his creased clothes.

The concerns hadn’t only come from her side.

‘You might be happy now but there’s no long-term future for you both,’ his more forthright friends had told him. ‘You’re a novelty, her bit of rough. You’ll never fit in properly to her world. She’ll grow tired of you, and then what?’

But for Oliver and Clem there had been no divide, only an ‘us’ that strengthened each time someone tried to draw them apart.

There was something about Anna that reminded him of Clem. The defiant tilt to her chin. Her loyalty to Adam. Her desire to protect him. He thought Anna wouldn’t let Adam go as easily as Clem had slipped through his fingers. Here one minute, gone the next.

He knew he shouldn’t, he knew he should go back to work, but he couldn’t help opening the sideboard and pulling out their wedding album. Touching her photos as he’d once have touched her face. He could still smell her sometimes, the heady mix of jasmine and lime. It was as if she had just popped out. He had been left waiting endlessly for her to return.

Oliver slipped on his white lab coat that felt as much a part of him as his skin, but instead of heading back to his research he lifted a glass from the cupboard.

Anna.

Clem.

He poured a drink, not whiskey now but orange juice. He never touched alcohol.

Not anymore.

Chapter Thirty-Two

Anna

Nell didn’t have any of the awkwardness I had first felt around Adam as he lay comatose in a hospital bed; she wasn’t intimidated by all the equipment. She immediately held his hand and chatted to him as comfortably as she would perched on a bar stool, sharing her news over a glass of wine.