“You always were a delusional bitch, Jemma.” He turned, heading for the door.

I saw red.

“You deserved it.”

His head twitched, and he half swivelled back in my direction, a question in his eyes. I stared him down.

“I know what he did to you. And you deserved it. He won’t take it back—he doesn’t do things like that lightly. He’s not morally corrupt … unlike you.”

Chad spun on his heel and walked stiffly to the door. He let himself out without another word.

I blew out a breath. “Holy Hell!”

Ezra grabbed me and swung me around. “Jem! That was amazing! I’ve never seen you act so … unaffected by that dickhead. Morally corrupt? Classic! But … what did SJ do to him?”

“Hold up!” Humphrey interjected. “Can we back up a step or ten? I feel like I’m missing a huge amount of backstory here.”

Ezra watched me carefully. “You want to tell him?” he asked gently.

I didn’t even hesitate to nod. “As far as I’m concerned, we’ve already inducted Humphrey into the Jemma’s Life is a Right Royal Mess Club. He may as well know everything.”

Quickly and dispassionately, I filled him in on my history with Chad. And then I filled them both in—because I realised I hadn’t actually told Ezra, with everything else that had been going on—about the brunch and my conversation with SJ in the café bathroom.

“So …” I nibbled on my lip. “I think … I’m not totally sure … well, I guess I probably am … that SJ tricked Chad into selling his soul to him, along with his ugly art.”

They gasped in unison, and I giggled nervously.

“No way!” Humphrey breathed. “That’s …”

“That is some epic karma, right there!” Ezra collapsed back onto the lounge, a guffaw bursting out of him. “Jemma! I hope SJ hung his art somewhere in the deepest bowels of Hell!”

My giggle became a full-blown cackle at the thought, and I fell onto the lounge beside Ezra.

“He’s already in love with you,” Humphrey blurted.

My chortle turned to a choke. “What?” I spluttered. “How can you possibly know that?”

Humphrey’s withering look told me he thought I was simple. “He literally doomed the eternal soul of your arsehole ex because he treated you like dirt. He might not have realised it himself yet … but this dude would burn the world down for you.” He sighed dramatically. “It’s so romantic!”

I sat upright, heart hammering. “Touch her and die,” I muttered, my eyes darting to Humphrey. “I think you might be right!”

“What are you talking about?” Ezra asked.

I leapt up and staggered to the bookshelf, tugging down Vibing With My Vampire TA: A Dark and Spicy Paranormal College Romance. I flipped through the pages until I found the spot I was after.

“Okay, so in this one, the FMC—female main character, Gertrude⁠—”