Chapters (174)
- Content Warning
- A Note to Readers on my Choice of Language
- Dedication
- Prologue
- SJ
- 1. Crochet Penises and Stinky Shadow Men
- Crochet Penises and Stinky Shadow Men
- Jemma
- 2. Bubble Bath … Interrupted
- Bubble Bath … Interrupted
- SJ
- 3. Objectively Objectifying a Sexy Blonde
- Objectively Objectifying a Sexy Blonde
- Jemma
- 4. Dinner and a Devilish Show
- Dinner and a Devilish Show
- SJ
- 5. Messages from FriendPay
- Messages from FriendPay
- Jemma
- 6. First Date with a New Soul
- First Date with a New Soul
- SJ
- 7. Shag Your Way Out of This …
- Shag Your Way Out of This …
- Jemma
- 8. No Pressure …
- No Pressure …
- SJ
- 9. Mount Those Horns of His
- Mount Those Horns of His
- Jemma
- 10. A Soft Spot for Mice
- A Soft Spot for Mice
- SJ
- 11. Date Faking
- Date Faking
- Jemma
- 12. Spicy Girl Dreams
- Spicy Girl Dreams
- SJ
- 13. Brunch with the Stinking Undie Stain
- Brunch with the Stinking Undie Stain
- Jemma
- 14. Ratty-Man
- Ratty-Man
- SJ
- 15. Sordid Bathroom Romps
- Sordid Bathroom Romps
- SJ
- 16. An Outright Lie
- An Outright Lie
- Jemma
- 17. Soul Reaping and Passive Misery
- Soul Reaping and Passive Misery
- SJ
- 18. Ferretcon
- Ferretcon
- Jemma
- 19. Bossy, Domineering Alpha Male
- Bossy, Domineering Alpha Male
- Jemma
- 20. It’s a Date, Big Boy
- It’s a Date, Big Boy
- SJ
- 21. The Stretchiness of Human Orifices
- The Stretchiness of Human Orifices
- Jemma
- 22. Distracted by Other Parts
- Distracted by Other Parts
- SJ
- 23. My Biggest Weakness. My Worst Enemy
- My Biggest Weakness. My Worst Enemy
- Jemma
- 24. A Super Creepy Diarrhoea Fetish
- A Super Creepy Diarrhoea Fetish
- SJ
- 25. Big and Red and … Glowing?
- Big and Red and … Glowing?
- Jemma
- 26. That’s Why I’m Afraid of the Dark
- That’s Why I’m Afraid of the Dark
- SJ
- 27. Giant Softies and Sizeable Stiffies
- Giant Softies and Sizeable Stiffies
- SJ
- 28. Pesky Feelings
- Pesky Feelings
- Jemma
- 29. A How-to Book on Seducing Human Maidens
- A How-to Book on Seducing Human Maidens
- SJ
- 30. Both Her Downstairs Holes
- Both Her Downstairs Holes
- Jemma
- 31. Fuck with Her and Find Out
- Fuck with Her and Find Out
- Jemma
- 32. Lovesick for Jemma Bliss
- Lovesick for Jemma Bliss
- SJ
- 33. Nobody’s Gonna Be Looking at Your Face …
- Nobody’s Gonna Be Looking at Your Face …
- Jemma
- 34. Dare You
- Dare You
- SJ
- 35. Let Me Play with My Pretty Mouse
- Let Me Play with My Pretty Mouse
- Jemma
- 36. Mystical Semen
- Mystical Semen
- SJ
- 37. A Goner for the Son of Satan
- A Goner for the Son of Satan
- Jemma
- 38. An Unnecessary Attachment
- An Unnecessary Attachment
- SJ
- 39. A Leaf Out of Her Book
- A Leaf Out of Her Book
- SJ
- 40. Walking, Talking Red Flag
- Walking, Talking Red Flag
- Jemma
- 41. Devils Don’t Cry
- Devils Don’t Cry
- SJ
- 42. He Wasn’t a Mafia Boyfriend
- He Wasn’t a Mafia Boyfriend
- Jemma
- 43. Wholesale Slaughter of Archangels
- Wholesale Slaughter of Archangels
- SJ
- 44. It’s a Grand Gesture
- It’s a Grand Gesture
- Jemma
- 45. Permanently in Purgatory
- Permanently in Purgatory
- SJ
- 46. Eldest Spawn of Satan
- Eldest Spawn of Satan
- Jemma
- 47. The B Team Strikes Again
- The B Team Strikes Again
- SJ
- 48. Not My Nightmare
- Not My Nightmare
- Jemma
- 49. Hold On, Mouse
- Hold On, Mouse
- SJ
- 50. My Heroic Devil
- My Heroic Devil
- Jemma
- 51. Not a Religious Celebrity
- Not a Religious Celebrity
- SJ
- 52. The Devil I Know
- The Devil I Know
- SJ
- 53. Let Them See
- Let Them See
- Jemma
- 54. I Never Really Wanted Your Soul
- I Never Really Wanted Your Soul
- SJ
- Epilogue: Not Quite One Year Later
- Jemma
- And … Another Epilogue
- SJ
- Acknowledgments
- Also by Layla Pine
- About Layla
I wanted to give her everything she deserved. Everything that she’d missed out on because of the tragedies of her past. But what could I offer her? Nothing that was desirable. I couldn’t bring her into my family—in fact, the thought of her even so much as sharing the same air as my father or Hellen … that thought filled me with dread.
I could not make a life with her here. But I was trapped here by my title.
She deserved happiness after everything she had been through … everything that I was putting her through.
And badness knew I wished I could be the one to give it to her.
But I couldn’t. So, avoiding her was, for now, my best option. Until I could work out a way to release her from our contract and set her free.
33. Nobody’s Gonna Be Looking at Your Face …
Chapter 33
Nobody’s Gonna Be Looking at Your Face …
Jemma
I could have sworn I was being watched.
“Right about now would be a great time … hypothetically speaking … for someone to pop in unannounced.” I waited.
Nothing.
I raised my voice. “Someone who might like to help me review this contract from the Ferretcon ladies …”
Still nothing.
I cleared my throat. “Someone who loves a good, airtight contract, and who got all overprotective of me when I tried to agree to something without seeing it in writing first. That someone might like to drop by …”
Silence.
I sighed and turned back to the contract. Maybe I was just paranoid. Maybe this feeling of something … other … being in my home, was just residual from all the previous occasions he’d opened a portal right under my nose.
I had two days until Friday the thirteenth. And only the bare bones of a plan for how to disguise myself to survive this dangerous task he had set out for me and hopefully get him to fall hard enough that he decided to make task four an easy one for me. A plan that involved the contract on my screen. But my brain went immediately fuzzy the second the first legalese word popped up.
“Oh well, if no one is coming to rescue me from the tedium of this contract … I suppose I’ll just sign my life away without perusing it thoroughly!” I shouted.
Radio silence.
I huffed and clicked the ‘sign now’ button, sending the thing zooming back via the interwebs to Esther and Jules. My new business partners. Who, in addition to founding Ferretcon, conveniently ran a cosplay business specialising in special-effects makeup.
“Who are you shouting at?” Ezra asked, poking his head around the bedroom door. I snapped my laptop shut guiltily, which was stupid because it wasn’t like I’d been doing anything nefarious, like, I don’t know … watching German Scheizer Porn or something.
“No one!” I shouted.
Ezra wrinkled his nose. “Well, why are you shouting at me?”