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Chapters (103)
  1. Cover
  2. Dedication
  3. Epigraph
  4. BEFORE
  5. PEYOTE
  6. PART I
  7. PEYOTE
  8. LILY
  9. PEYOTE
  10. MICKEY
  11. PEYOTE
  12. MICKEY
  13. PEYOTE
  14. SILAS
  15. PEYOTE
  16. MICKEY
  17. LILY
  18. PEYOTE
  19. MICKEY
  20. PEYOTE
  21. LILY
  22. PEYOTE
  23. MICKEY
  24. PEYOTE
  25. PART II
  26. LILY
  27. PEYOTE
  28. SILAS
  29. PEYOTE
  30. MICKEY
  31. PEYOTE
  32. MICKEY
  33. LILY
  34. PEYOTE
  35. SILAS
  36. PEYOTE
  37. LILY
  38. PEYOTE
  39. MICKEY
  40. PEYOTE
  41. LILY
  42. MICKEY
  43. PEYOTE
  44. SILAS
  45. PEYOTE
  46. MICKEY
  47. PEYOTE
  48. LILY
  49. PEYOTE
  50. SILAS
  51. PEYOTE
  52. MICKEY
  53. PEYOTE
  54. SILAS
  55. PEYOTE
  56. LILY
  57. PEYOTE
  58. SILAS
  59. PEYOTE
  60. LILY
  61. PEYOTE
  62. MICKEY
  63. LILY
  64. PEYOTE
  65. PART III
  66. LILY
  67. PEYOTE
  68. LILY
  69. PEYOTE
  70. LILY
  71. PEYOTE
  72. MICKEY
  73. PEYOTE
  74. LILY
  75. PEYOTE
  76. MICKEY
  77. PEYOTE
  78. SILAS
  79. PEYOTE
  80. MICKEY
  81. PEYOTE
  82. LILY
  83. PEYOTE
  84. LILY
  85. PEYOTE
  86. MICKEY
  87. PEYOTE
  88. SILAS
  89. PEYOTE
  90. SILAS
  91. LILY
  92. SILAS
  93. PHILIP
  94. PEYOTE
  95. LILY
  96. PEYOTE
  97. LILY
  98. PEYOTE
  99. AFTER
  100. PEYOTE
  101. ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
  102. ABOUT THE AUTHOR
  103. What’s next onyour reading list?

Silas laughed, despite himself. He hadn’t heard that word in a long time. He wanted to tell Lily, see if she had the same memory of that away game senior year.

“Who is this girl?”

“You have to keep stirring, Dad.”

Silas went back to stirring.

“Her name is Ruth.”

“Is she your age?” Silas asked, keeping the spoon moving. The broth in the pot steamed.

“Going into tenth grade,” Mickey answered. “She’s super cool. Really pretty too.”

“Well, look at you, Miss Thang,” Silas said. Mickey rolled her eyes.

“No one says ‘Miss Thang’ anymore.”

“One person does,” Silas answered, pointing to his chest.

“Where is Mom?” Mickey asked, pushing herself off the counter and opening the fridge.

“Work. She’ll be home soon.”

Mickey grabbed a can of seltzer and closed the fridge door. Silas thought she looked disappointed, but he couldn’t tell if the disappointment was because of Lily’s absence or her inevitable return. Lily and Mickey’s dynamic had shifted recently. Silas and Lily’s friends said it was normal teenage behavior: daughter taking out her anger on mom. Silas always secretly hoped his kids were above all of that typical development stuff, but it was becoming clear that they weren’t.

“Shower before dinner?” he asked.

“How long do I have?”

“Long enough—you’re gross,” he said, patting her head and making a big deal of wiping sweat on his pants.

“I wouldn’t be gross if you didn’t make me join this stupid team,” Mickey said. “I would be clean all day long.”

“But you wouldn’t have met your cool, pretty new friend,” Silas said, and Mickey smiled. It surprised him, how happy she looked.

Ruth, he thought. He’d have to check the school website and see what he could find out. There couldn’t be too many Ruths in Mickey and Sean’s school. It wasn’t a name he heard often.

“She seriously pantsed him, Dad, like, in front of everyone.”

Mickey was beaming now, with a dreamy look. That was the word that came to mind when he considered her, leaning against the fridge: “dreamy.”

“That sounds pretty mean.”

“Trust me, he deserved it,” Mickey answered, and Silas did. Trust her.

“Dinner in twenty,” he said when she leaned in and put her head on his chest for a second, a hug without arms. “Tell your brother.”

“I’m not knocking on his door.”

“Just yell it in the hallway.”

He stirred the pot, added more salt and pepper. He wanted to put on a new record, but he couldn’t abandon the food. He wished he had asked Mickey to do it before she left, but he heard the water in the pipes upstairs and knew he had missed his chance.