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Chapters (103)
  1. Cover
  2. Dedication
  3. Epigraph
  4. BEFORE
  5. PEYOTE
  6. PART I
  7. PEYOTE
  8. LILY
  9. PEYOTE
  10. MICKEY
  11. PEYOTE
  12. MICKEY
  13. PEYOTE
  14. SILAS
  15. PEYOTE
  16. MICKEY
  17. LILY
  18. PEYOTE
  19. MICKEY
  20. PEYOTE
  21. LILY
  22. PEYOTE
  23. MICKEY
  24. PEYOTE
  25. PART II
  26. LILY
  27. PEYOTE
  28. SILAS
  29. PEYOTE
  30. MICKEY
  31. PEYOTE
  32. MICKEY
  33. LILY
  34. PEYOTE
  35. SILAS
  36. PEYOTE
  37. LILY
  38. PEYOTE
  39. MICKEY
  40. PEYOTE
  41. LILY
  42. MICKEY
  43. PEYOTE
  44. SILAS
  45. PEYOTE
  46. MICKEY
  47. PEYOTE
  48. LILY
  49. PEYOTE
  50. SILAS
  51. PEYOTE
  52. MICKEY
  53. PEYOTE
  54. SILAS
  55. PEYOTE
  56. LILY
  57. PEYOTE
  58. SILAS
  59. PEYOTE
  60. LILY
  61. PEYOTE
  62. MICKEY
  63. LILY
  64. PEYOTE
  65. PART III
  66. LILY
  67. PEYOTE
  68. LILY
  69. PEYOTE
  70. LILY
  71. PEYOTE
  72. MICKEY
  73. PEYOTE
  74. LILY
  75. PEYOTE
  76. MICKEY
  77. PEYOTE
  78. SILAS
  79. PEYOTE
  80. MICKEY
  81. PEYOTE
  82. LILY
  83. PEYOTE
  84. LILY
  85. PEYOTE
  86. MICKEY
  87. PEYOTE
  88. SILAS
  89. PEYOTE
  90. SILAS
  91. LILY
  92. SILAS
  93. PHILIP
  94. PEYOTE
  95. LILY
  96. PEYOTE
  97. LILY
  98. PEYOTE
  99. AFTER
  100. PEYOTE
  101. ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
  102. ABOUT THE AUTHOR
  103. What’s next onyour reading list?

She was beautiful. There was no denying that. Not only because of the wide cut of her eyes and the naturally swollen heft to her bottom lip like something stung or freshly fed. Not only because of the length of her, the way each inch seemed to unfurl from the last, a runaway spool of silk. Not only—certainly not, although Silas couldn’t deny the appeal of it—because of her newness. He had noticed the way the bones of her feet barely spread with each step she took, like she was walking on prized organic produce. Like the world had not yet taught her skin how to keep her safe.

He wondered if he would ever stop being surprised by the resemblance; if he would ever see Ruth without the cellophane of Sarah’s ghost. He doubted it.

Even more, he wasn’t sure he wanted to try.

And then it hit him. The one bargaining chip he had yet to use.

“Phil, how about this?” he asked. His eyes burned, but this time it was from the wind. He hadn’t cried about his brother since he left the pond all those years before.

“What if you could see Sarah?”

A whip of wind pushed his back, and that was all he needed.

PEYOTE

ornament

I HAD ONE BRIEF moment of satisfaction watching Cal’s face when she saw me instead of her little lackey. She looked truly shocked, scared even. It was delicious. But then she spoke.

“Pey, you fucking idiot! What are you doing here? Where did you get that?”

“I know everything,” I said, swallowing back her response as I pulled the necklace safely out of reach and hung it around my neck. “There is no football team. They’re your dad’s soldiers. Your brothers, as you called them. And you want his key—his mark—so that you can brand yourself and escape to Heaven. Well, I have news for you, bucko. There’s no such—”

“Do you have any idea what you just did?” Cal stared at the spot where Trey had been, her voice a hoarse whisper.

I’d told her I knew everything, and she hadn’t even flinched. I was done trying to surprise her with my wit. Nothing mattered but what I needed.

“Give me my results,” I said. “Now.”

“I will! I was always going to. But you just destroyed your perfect alibi.”

“What are you talking about?”

Cal ran both hands through her hair, her eyes darting between me and the building.

“Fuck. Fuck! It’s too late now. I wanted to keep you out of this. I wanted to take Trey down with me. But you just saved his ass by sending him back down to the office, didn’t you? Fuck, that’s such a shame.”

Cal pulled a folded piece of paper from her pocket, took my hand, and wrapped my fist tightly around it.