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Chapters (103)
  1. Cover
  2. Dedication
  3. Epigraph
  4. BEFORE
  5. PEYOTE
  6. PART I
  7. PEYOTE
  8. LILY
  9. PEYOTE
  10. MICKEY
  11. PEYOTE
  12. MICKEY
  13. PEYOTE
  14. SILAS
  15. PEYOTE
  16. MICKEY
  17. LILY
  18. PEYOTE
  19. MICKEY
  20. PEYOTE
  21. LILY
  22. PEYOTE
  23. MICKEY
  24. PEYOTE
  25. PART II
  26. LILY
  27. PEYOTE
  28. SILAS
  29. PEYOTE
  30. MICKEY
  31. PEYOTE
  32. MICKEY
  33. LILY
  34. PEYOTE
  35. SILAS
  36. PEYOTE
  37. LILY
  38. PEYOTE
  39. MICKEY
  40. PEYOTE
  41. LILY
  42. MICKEY
  43. PEYOTE
  44. SILAS
  45. PEYOTE
  46. MICKEY
  47. PEYOTE
  48. LILY
  49. PEYOTE
  50. SILAS
  51. PEYOTE
  52. MICKEY
  53. PEYOTE
  54. SILAS
  55. PEYOTE
  56. LILY
  57. PEYOTE
  58. SILAS
  59. PEYOTE
  60. LILY
  61. PEYOTE
  62. MICKEY
  63. LILY
  64. PEYOTE
  65. PART III
  66. LILY
  67. PEYOTE
  68. LILY
  69. PEYOTE
  70. LILY
  71. PEYOTE
  72. MICKEY
  73. PEYOTE
  74. LILY
  75. PEYOTE
  76. MICKEY
  77. PEYOTE
  78. SILAS
  79. PEYOTE
  80. MICKEY
  81. PEYOTE
  82. LILY
  83. PEYOTE
  84. LILY
  85. PEYOTE
  86. MICKEY
  87. PEYOTE
  88. SILAS
  89. PEYOTE
  90. SILAS
  91. LILY
  92. SILAS
  93. PHILIP
  94. PEYOTE
  95. LILY
  96. PEYOTE
  97. LILY
  98. PEYOTE
  99. AFTER
  100. PEYOTE
  101. ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
  102. ABOUT THE AUTHOR
  103. What’s next onyour reading list?

“What, exactly?” Lily asked. She had never noticed how suffocating the night could be. She thought about turning on the AC, cranking it up all the way even though the air outside was that of a perfect New England summer. She wanted to turn on everything in that car, until it flashed and honked and screamed. But when he opened his car door and she heard his shoes crack the pine needles of the woods’ floor, she knew, and she went out after him.

PEYOTE

ornament

THE AIR IN THE room both smelled and felt like soup. Not fresh soup, but rather a bowl left out in the sink, with the membrane that clings to the edges. It took a minute for my eyes to adjust to the gloom.

The sleeping body in the bed was not what I expected. I expected a bull of a man with the kind of smile that leaves its target feeling defiled, even from across a room. The kind of man who turns boys into soldiers without a war. The kind of man who could make a daughter like Cal. But this man was something else entirely. He was closer to a sack of flour than any of those things.

I looked at Cal’s face, and I could tell she was thrown too. When you live outside of time, it can be easy to forget how it passes on Earth. But here was the proof, sagged in front of us. Melted by it.

But she didn’t hesitate for long. She pushed down the comforter, which was hiked up to his chin like a child’s, and reached into the soft dough of his neck. When she felt it, she pulled. The leather strap gave easily, without waking him up.

Once it was in her fist, Cal seemed surprised. As if she hadn’t expected to get this far.

“I could still take it to Jason,” I said, watching her as much as the key. For such a desired object, it was very plain. It was the color of aged silver and ended in a trefoil, each of the three leaves punched with a perfect hole in the center. I can’t say I didn’t feel a flutter at finally seeing it, but ultimately, like most sought things, once found, it proved disappointing.

But not to Cal. She let the key spin in front of her for a moment before guiding it into her open palm, and didn’t answer.

“Cal?” I said, but she just stared. I was about to say her name again when she turned to me.

“It’s not real, right? You said it’s not real. I know it’s not. Right?”