Double damn it! Ezra was far too observant for his own good!

“I thought I was your best friend, Jem!” The hurt in Ez’s tone almost broke me. “I tell you literally everything about my love life, and yet …” He turned, propping himself on the armrest of the lounge. “What is going on? You don’t mention a word about some hot new man in your life, and the first I hear is gossip about how you’re practically at second base with him in the activity room of the paediatric cancer ward!”

I flushed crimson. “Well, when you put it like that, it sounds …”

“What other way should I put it?” He got up from the lounge and came to sit at the kitchen bench. “Tell me that the rumours are exaggerated, please! Because it’s not like you to jump into something … intense … with a man you barely know.”

I scoffed. “You’re a fine one to judge, going out on a first date and not coming home until the following afternoon!”

Ezra’s jaw twitched, and he looked away. I immediately felt awful.

“Hey, Ez … I’m sorry. That was a shitty thing to say. Humphrey’s a really nice guy, and I’m glad you’ve hit it off.”

Ezra ruffled his bright hair, letting out a deep sigh. “I just want to know that you’re happy. And that you’re safe. There have been times in the past when you’ve kept things from me because you’ve been hurting, and I think sometimes you think that pretending everything is alright is easier than sharing your problems, but …”

I snatched up another donut, shoving it into my mouth. He had no idea how close to the surface the past was today … or how close I was to blurting out too much about the present. And the secret I was keeping from him this time was much, much bigger, and worse, than anything I’d ever tried to shield him from in the past.

But there was no way that I could tell him the truth about SJ. Aside from the fact that it was far too big a burden to put on him … he’d never believe me anyway. He’d think I’d finally lost the plot. I mean, it was the most ridiculous predicament—having temporarily handed over one’s soul for a box of gluten-free donuts.

No, he didn’t need to be dragged into this nonsense.

So I opened my mouth, and for the first time since we’d met on the very first day of high school, I outright lied to Ezra.

* * *

“So …” Ezra’s voice was muffled around a mouthful of peace-offering donut. “You literally fell over him while getting donuts, he invited you to take a walk with him … and you two made plans to share Thai takeaway at home, while I was out with Humphrey?”

“Uh huh!” I replied, nodding enthusiastically.