What if I am not able to finalize this agreement? What if Dufresne is asked to leave immediately? What if Tom decides to carry on running Lederman without any help or advice from Dufresne? What if, god forbid, the company loses track of its strategic vision and tactical roadmap? What if it goes bankrupt, jobs are lost, depositors are destroyed and the very banking system collapses?

For a brief moment Diary, I felt a shiver of pure fear run up my spine. Perhaps I am exaggerating.

Perhaps all that stands between Lederman and a banking disaster is Dufresne.

It is a sobering thought. But you know how I am when it comes to tremendous personal pressure: Face it, fight it, defeat it.

FUCK GOURI HAS JUST SENT A REALLY LONG EMAIL! I HAVE SCROLLED THREE TIMES WITH MY MOUSE AND THERE IS STILL TEXT LEFT!

Cannot read now.

Sugandh has come.

Too many things happening in my life at the same time Diary.

9.20 p.m.

Part of me wants to hug Sugandh and give him hope and optimism and courage.

Part of me wants to electrocute him slowly by his balls.

Increasingly, Diary, he is beginning to remind me of that school friend of dad’s who lived in Abu Dhabi for two or three years. This was before I had started writing a diary. Initially, when he came to live with us for a week, he seemed like a nice guy. And then he started coming over every weekend and eating all the food and using up all the milk and tea bags. Mom got damn irritated and finally one day asked him to show some control.

And then he started crying and told us that he was alone in the Gulf, had no job, no friends and no money and we were the only family he had. Then we got all senti and let him stay. And then one weekend he came, slept over, got up early the next morning and then disappeared with the mixer–grinder, hand-whisk and the Hoover.

Last I heard of him he is living in Oman working as a security guard for a local Arab family.

I don’t know if Sugandh will steal from me. But he does leave me with mixed emotions.

Tonight he brought with him draft two of his biodata.

At first it looked like he had done a much better job. He had used the template well and filled in all the sections. He had used the objective I wrote for him. And he had managed to fill in the one page completely. I told him it looked very nice at first glance. He asked me to read it in detail and look for spelling mistakes.

I quickly scanned it and then noticed, to my complete surprise, that his favourite music band was also Yanni. And that his hobbies were also rock climbing, endurance sports, power-lifting, feminism and Mediterranean cuisine.