She then gave me a 45-minute lecture on how I was being very cheap by not spending even 25 pounds for her. I asked her when was the last time she checked Indian Rupee—Sterling Pound exchange rate. She cut the phone. I also quickly cut to avoid any unnecessary billing.

I was very upset but then ran back to the hotel for the complimentary evening tea. (Free with room. Otherwise 15 pounds.)

I had four croissants.

How do I make Gouri understand my problem?

If I don’t sort this out, this wax nonsense might have serious implications for our relationship. In my opinion our relationship has reached a very high level of trust and understanding. But is it high enough to handle this wax statue problem?

Anyways.

I have a presentation tomorrow. And then I have to take my weekly business strategy lecture for some new Lederman recruits here.

The bank is still highly excited about my management guru reputation.

Rightly so.

Bye.

8.32 p.m.

Brainwave. I may have a solution for this wax museum issue.

More after I give it a shot tomorrow.

18 March 2007

10.23 p.m.

Everything was going according to plan. It was a brilliant plan. Brilliant I tell you Diary.

And then a machine defeated me.

A fucking machine.

(Not a fucking machine. Not in that sense.)

(OFF TO DINNER.)

Back from dinner. They had some horrible steak for main course. Rubbery meat, bitter sauce and cold potatoes.

Could only eat two plates. Now I feel sick.

Later.

19 March 2007

8.34 p.m.

Diary, I decided to not take any chances today. I’ve been to the toilet at least 15 times today. Yesterday’s steak was a terrible mistake.

The seventh trip to the toilet in the office (eleventh one overall for the day) was unbelievably embarrassing.

So around four in the evening HR asked me if I could take a short session on corporate strategy for a batch of Lederman summer interns. Apparently they are going through orientation and the guy who was supposed to speak to them forgot to bring his slides.

I assured her that I was experienced in both slide-ful and slide-free presentations. And in any case, I told her, corporate strategy is not a subject you have to prepare for or revise. Corporate strategy is something you live everyday. She told me I was exactly the sort of young leader the interns had to meet.

The presentation, as usual, started very well. I opened with a few classic jokes on corporate strategy. And then smoothly moved into my usual sequences of talking points on ‘Strategy and You’, ‘Strategy: From the Heart’, ‘Strategy: From the Soul’, ‘Strategy: From the Gut’ and ‘Strategy Is More than Just Jargon: Brainstorming for a Deliverable-Critical Priority Framework’.

Usually this sequence only takes me 15 to 20 minutes. But unfortunately just as I started my From the Heart section, my stomach started to rumble horribly. I could hear it make noises.

At first I tried to ignore it and carry on.