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Back When I Lost You Save as PDF
Chapters (81)
  1. Cover
  2. About the Author
  3. Dedication
  4. Prologue
  5. One
  6. Two
  7. Three
  8. Four
  9. Five
  10. Six
  11. Seven
  12. Eight
  13. Nine
  14. Ten
  15. Eleven
  16. Twelve
  17. Thirteen
  18. Fourteen
  19. Fifteen
  20. Sixteen
  21. Seventeen
  22. Eighteen
  23. Nineteen
  24. Twenty
  25. Twenty-one
  26. Twenty-two
  27. Twenty-three
  28. Twenty-four
  29. Twenty-five
  30. Twenty-six
  31. Twenty-seven
  32. Twenty-eight
  33. Twenty-nine
  34. Thirty
  35. Thirty-one
  36. Thirty-two
  37. Thirty-three
  38. Thirty-four
  39. Thirty-five
  40. Thirty-six
  41. Thirty-seven
  42. Thirty-eight
  43. Thirty-nine
  44. Forty
  45. Forty-one
  46. Forty-two
  47. Forty-three
  48. Forty-four
  49. Forty-five
  50. Forty-six
  51. Forty-seven
  52. Forty-eight
  53. Forty-nine
  54. Fifty
  55. Fifty-one
  56. Fifty-two
  57. Fifty-three
  58. Fifty-four
  59. Fifty-five
  60. Fifty-six
  61. Fifty-seven
  62. Fifty-eight
  63. Fifty-nine
  64. Sixty
  65. Sixty-one
  66. Sixty-two
  67. Sixty-three
  68. Sixty-four
  69. Sixty-five
  70. Sixty-six
  71. Sixty-seven
  72. Epilogue
  73. Acknowledgments
  74. Read More
  75. Prologue
  76. One
  77. Two
  78. Three
  79. Four
  80. Follow Merilyn online
  81. Dedication

I walk across, wishing my dress was longer and my lipstick less red. The man on the sofa next to Alf smiles and suddenly I’m so relieved to see he has nice eyes just like Alf, warm and friendly. I sit next to him and smile back.

‘Wow, that’s a pretty smile you have there.’

I smile a bit more and he laughs.

‘A right proper little Cheshire cat.’

I relax back into the sofa and look up at him. He strokes my hair and I almost close my eyes, and then I finally do when he carries on for what feels like hours.

Alf nudges me. ‘Hey there, sleepyhead. Drink this, it’ll perk you up.’

I sit up and take a mouthful. Knowing the acrid smell will make me gag, I concentrate on not breathing. I take another and another and within five minutes the world starts to slide away from me: I am happy and a giggle comes out of nowhere.

I struggle to focus on Alf, but I see him nod to the man next to me and I swing my head round to him. He smiles, I return it.

‘Come on, you sweet, sweet thing.’ He stands and helps me off the sofa. I feel his arm round my waist and I laugh because it tickles. He moves me towards Alf’s bedroom and I try to turn round to see Aoife, but the man stops me.

‘Come on now, you don’t want to disappoint Alf, do you?’

And of course, I don’t. I’d never want to do that. So I just smile again and follow him inside.

Twenty-six

The bus dropped Carla in the centre of Witney and after a short walk she pushed at their front door. Something barred her way and it was only after squeezing through the tiny gap that she saw what was causing it: Baz’s overnight bag.

‘Baz?’ She threw her keys on the hall table. What was his bag doing there? Was he on a late call-out? But since when did that mean he took his bag?

She called again, forcefully this time, as she looked in the tiny kitchen before carrying on to the front room.

He was sitting on the sofa. The room was lit only by the street lights outside and she felt panic compress her chest. He’d found them. She was sure of it.

‘Baz?’

He didn’t turn, and Carla’s heart began to pound high up in her chest.

When finally Baz turned to look at her, the pain and confusion in his face made her stomach lurch. And then she saw them, lying on the coffee table, a white packet bright in the gloom: her contraceptive pills.