Sitting up in bed now, he pinches himself, in short, sharp snaps all over his arms, but he can’t stop his mind racing. Hailey is gone and it’s all his fault. He folds his fingers into his palms, draws his knees to his chest and wraps his arms around them. Dropping his forehead onto his kneecaps with a jolt, feeling bone against bone, fighting the urge to do it again, harder, to hurt himself.

He needs to speak to someone, not about Hailey but about… anything. Crap. Take his mind off her and his guilt and his regret. Mindless chatter to slow his heart and still his mind so he can sleep again. Ryan never goes to bed until at least midnight. Connor doesn’t usually either. He tries to FaceTime but Ryan doesn’t pick up.

He waits a few minutes, imagining Ryan pausing his Xbox, picking up his phone and he calls him again.

And again.

He can’t remember a time Ryan wasn’t at the end of his phone but his calls remain unanswered.

There was that figure standing near the school.

The sense of eyes on his back.

Mum chasing away the car.

Christ, what has happened to Tyler?

He curls into a ball on his side, reassuring himself that Ryan can’t have disappeared like Tyler. Any second now he’ll call back.

He stares at his phone, willing it to ring so he knows Ryan is okay.

It doesn’t.

Chapter Thirty-Two

Lucy

Three days until Connor is taken

It’s almost simultaneous. Connor heading out of the front door for school and Mel ringing.

‘Lucy, am I too late to catch Ryan? He’s not answering his mobile, is he still there?’ Her questions come at me in a rush.

‘Ryan?’ I rub the sleep from my eyes. It had been a rough night.

‘He’s forgotten his essay. I’ve just found it in his room.’

‘Ryan hasn’t been here this morning.’

‘But he stayed with you last night?’

‘No. Was he supposed to?’ Connor hadn’t told me.

There’s an edge to her voice. An edge to mine.

‘No. But he went out in the evening, said he was going to yours. I fell asleep and I’ve just woken up. So he isn’t there? Lucy, he’s been out all night.’ Her voice sounds small and high against the blood pounding in my ears.

I pace the room, unsure what to say. My heart is racing. ‘Mel…’ I’m helpless. ‘Don’t worry. I’m sure he’s fine.’

‘But where is he?’

‘Have you tried Fergus?’

‘Fergus. God. No. I’ll try him from the landline. Hold on.’ I hear her mutter under her breath, ‘Pick up, pick up, pick up.’

‘He’s not answering.’ Her fear crawls over my skin. ‘Lucy. What should I do?’