Back My Brother Is a Big, Fat Liar Save as PDF
Contents ( 134)
  1. Rafe Is a Big, Fat Liar
  2. Don’t Mess with a Khatchadorian
  3. Horrors of an (In)Famous Brother
  4. Miller the (Mini) Killer
  5. Rhonda Helps Me, Helps, Helps Me, Rhonda
  6. The Awesomes!
  7. We Stink!
  8. Home, Sweet Home
  9. Sweet Home Georgiabama
  10. My Mom Is My Best Friend
  11. The Princess Dress Code
  12. Not My Problem
  13. This Is Probably a Ginormous Mistake, But…
  14. I’m In!
  15. Mrs. Stricker Loves Me
  16. Mrs. Stricker Loves Me Not…
  17. “The First Detention Is Always the Hardest”—RAFE K.
  18. A Day at the School Factory
  19. Every Band Needs a Groupie
  20. Squealing on Rafe Is Fun
  21. My Mom Is My Worst Nightmare
  22. It Ain’t Easy Being Green
  23. The Princesses’ Hairstyle Rules
  24. I Wasn’t Crying About My Hair
  25. I’m Being Followed
  26. Stop, Book Thief!
  27. My Six Favorite Books This Year (So Far)
  28. The Truth About Jeanne Galletta
  29. General Rafe Torture
  30. Rafe’s Revenge
  31. Playing War
  32. Shoo Pie, Don’t Bother Me
  33. Completely Insane
  34. Grandma’s Nineteenth Nervous Breakdown
  35. “We Stink” Up the Garage Sale
  36. The Aftermath
  37. Going Bananas
  38. I Find You Offensive, Mini-Miller the Killer
  39. The Princesses
  40. Georgia’s Last Stand
  41. Rhonda Runs
  42. South Nowhere Street
  43. Smacked Down
  44. When You Seek Revenge, Dig Two Graves
  45. Revenge Served Lukewarm
  46. A Visit with the Lizard King
  47. This Deserves Two Chapters
  48. Crime and Punishment
  49. Shrinkology
  50. More Shrinkology
  51. Jeanne Galletta Is Actually a Princess
  52. Practice Doesn’t Always Make Perfect
  53. How I Became a Princess
  54. The Strange Truth
  55. Jules Explains It All
  56. I’m Not Going
  57. Band Gone Weird
  58. Princess Gone Wild
  59. My Mom Is… My Mom
  60. One Other Thing
  61. Cease-Fire Between Rafe and Me (This Is Real. Honest.)
  62. Cease-Fire Over, War Resumes
  63. And… I Lost the Bet
  64. A SLAM-BAM ENDiNG(?) FOR OuR STORY
  65. WeLCOMe TO CAMP WANNAMORRA
  66. Contents
  67. Copyright

“WELL, THINK ABOUT IT!” Rhonda cried. “YOU’LL BE UP ONSTAGE!”

“And it’s your first school dance,” Mom agreed. “Rhonda’s right. I’m taking you to Smythe and Smythe.”

“The fancy department store?” I asked. I’d actually set foot in there only once before. A very tall, very scary-looking woman with no eyebrows squirted me with a bottle of stinky perfume. It took two days to get the smell off.

So that’s how I forgot to mention my detention and instead ended up going shopping with Rhonda and my mom.

I headed straight for the sale rack, where fashions come to die of humiliation.

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“None of these really seem like me,” I said.

“WHAT ABOUT THIS ONE?” Rhonda asked.

From Rhonda’s excited tone, I could only imagine what she had just picked up.

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Fortunately, my imagination was way off.

“Oh, I love it!” Mom said, taking the hanger from Rhonda and grabbing my arm. “Georgia, you have to try it on.”

So I did.

I knew it was the perfect dress even before I stepped out of the dressing room. But when I came out, Rhonda let out a screech and tackled my mom in a huge hug. Mom said, “You look beautiful, Georgia.”

I turned and gazed at myself in the three-way mirror. Beautiful? Well, she’s my mom. But I definitely looked pretty good.

“IN YOUR FACE, MISSY TRILLIN!” Rhonda squealed.

I smiled. Yeah, I thought. I look kinda princessy. In a good way.

This could really work.

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The Strange Truth

I was still wondering how to bring up the detention thing when Mom and I got home from shopping. But Mom made a beeline for her room and started digging around in the bottom of her closet. “What are you doing?” I asked.

“You’ll see.” Mom grunted. Then she pulled out a battered old shoe box. She flashed me a triumphant grin and said, “Come sit by me.”

It was actually kind of cozy there in my mom’s closet. She lifted the lid of the box. Inside was a pile of old photos.

“Um, you can burn this one,” I said, picking up a picture of me dressed as a chicken for Halloween when I was three.

“Are you kidding?” Mom chuckled. “That’s adorable!”

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“Here it is!” Mom held out a photo.

“Who’s that?” I asked.

“It’s me!” Mom actually laughed. “At the sixth-grade dance.”

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“You?” I stared at the photo. “Wow. It’s kinda weird how I really don’t look anything like you did in sixth grade.”

Grandma Dotty appeared in the doorway. “Why would you two look alike?” she asked.

“Mother, do you mind?” My mom pushed the closet door shut. For a minute it was dark, and I couldn’t see anything. Then Mom reached up and pulled the light chain. Maybe it was the overhead lighting, but my mother’s face looked weird.