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Contents ( 134)
  1. Rafe Is a Big, Fat Liar
  2. Don’t Mess with a Khatchadorian
  3. Horrors of an (In)Famous Brother
  4. Miller the (Mini) Killer
  5. Rhonda Helps Me, Helps, Helps Me, Rhonda
  6. The Awesomes!
  7. We Stink!
  8. Home, Sweet Home
  9. Sweet Home Georgiabama
  10. My Mom Is My Best Friend
  11. The Princess Dress Code
  12. Not My Problem
  13. This Is Probably a Ginormous Mistake, But…
  14. I’m In!
  15. Mrs. Stricker Loves Me
  16. Mrs. Stricker Loves Me Not…
  17. “The First Detention Is Always the Hardest”—RAFE K.
  18. A Day at the School Factory
  19. Every Band Needs a Groupie
  20. Squealing on Rafe Is Fun
  21. My Mom Is My Worst Nightmare
  22. It Ain’t Easy Being Green
  23. The Princesses’ Hairstyle Rules
  24. I Wasn’t Crying About My Hair
  25. I’m Being Followed
  26. Stop, Book Thief!
  27. My Six Favorite Books This Year (So Far)
  28. The Truth About Jeanne Galletta
  29. General Rafe Torture
  30. Rafe’s Revenge
  31. Playing War
  32. Shoo Pie, Don’t Bother Me
  33. Completely Insane
  34. Grandma’s Nineteenth Nervous Breakdown
  35. “We Stink” Up the Garage Sale
  36. The Aftermath
  37. Going Bananas
  38. I Find You Offensive, Mini-Miller the Killer
  39. The Princesses
  40. Georgia’s Last Stand
  41. Rhonda Runs
  42. South Nowhere Street
  43. Smacked Down
  44. When You Seek Revenge, Dig Two Graves
  45. Revenge Served Lukewarm
  46. A Visit with the Lizard King
  47. This Deserves Two Chapters
  48. Crime and Punishment
  49. Shrinkology
  50. More Shrinkology
  51. Jeanne Galletta Is Actually a Princess
  52. Practice Doesn’t Always Make Perfect
  53. How I Became a Princess
  54. The Strange Truth
  55. Jules Explains It All
  56. I’m Not Going
  57. Band Gone Weird
  58. Princess Gone Wild
  59. My Mom Is… My Mom
  60. One Other Thing
  61. Cease-Fire Between Rafe and Me (This Is Real. Honest.)
  62. Cease-Fire Over, War Resumes
  63. And… I Lost the Bet
  64. A SLAM-BAM ENDiNG(?) FOR OuR STORY
  65. WeLCOMe TO CAMP WANNAMORRA
  66. Contents
  67. Copyright

As I clanged the huge knocker, I thought I saw the hideous flowered curtains move, just a little. Like someone was peeking out. But no one answered the door. I knocked again. And again.

Rhonda doesn’t know who she’s dealing with, I thought as I kept knocking. Rafe could’ve told her—I don’t give up that easily.

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“GO AWAY!” Rhonda shouted from the other side of the door.

“No!” I knocked again, then rang the doorbell three times in a row just to be annoying.

Rhonda opened the door a crack but left on the security chain, like I was a burglar or a church lady she wanted to avoid. “WE AREN’T EVEN FRIENDS,” she announced.

“Don’t be dumb. Of course we are.”

“WE ARE?” Rhonda looked so hopeful. Her whole face lit up.

“Of course you’re my friend.” I swallowed. “Rhonda… I’m sorry I said that to Missy. The truth is—you’re my best friend at HVMS.” I knew it was true the minute I said it. Rhonda was sort of weird, and sort of annoying, and—frankly—a style disaster. But she was also unique. And brave. And kind.

I thought about Missy and felt embarrassed. How could I ever have cared what she thought?

Rhonda blinked, and I could see the sparkle of tears on her upper lashes. She pulled off the security chain and opened the door, but she didn’t invite me inside. “WHY DID YOU TELL MISSY WE WEREN’T FRIENDS?”

“Because… I’m an idiot,” I confessed. “Rhonda, I’m really, really sorry.”

Rhonda didn’t say anything. She just pulled me into a hug.

I’d never been that close to Rhonda before, and I was surprised by her pretty fabric-softener smell and her strong, soft arms. “You’re squishing me,” I told her.

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Then we pulled apart, and we both laughed like we were a little embarrassed. Rhonda swiped at her eyes, and I saw that the tears were gone. “BEST FRIENDS!” she said brightly.

“Okay, but—” I bit my lip. “Rhonda, maybe you could… try not to follow me around so much?”

“SURE, GEORGIA! NO FOLLOWING!” She thought that over for a moment. “BUT WE CAN STILL HANG OUT ALL THE TIME, RIGHT?”

I sighed. I guess it was too much to hope that Rhonda would suddenly turn normal. But that was okay.

Who’s normal?

Missy?

Right. I’d take Rhonda any day.

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Smacked Down

That evening, I sat perched on my favorite stool at Swifty’s as Mom darted back and forth like a dragonfly behind me. The diner was jammed with the usual supper crowd, but the noise didn’t bother me. I was reading The Invention of Hugo Cabret and drinking a (gasp!) chocolate milk shake, which Mom let me have after someone sent it back, insisting that he’d meant to order strawberry. I should have been happy.

But how could I be? Missy and her family were in the corner booth again.