“Y’all are too much,” I say, before lifting my glass of vodka cranberry and taking a sip. The effects of the last shot are starting to take hold, so I know I should slow down, but we’re out and about, and celebrating being Vance free, so we all know we’re not about to pump any brakes here. “Maybe I was tripping a little, but it was good at first. When we started out, Vance was fine and we had a good relationship.”

“Was he funny?” Shay asks.

“Well, not really,” I answer.

“Was he a really good listener?” Juliana inquires with raised eyebrows.

“Nah, not really,” I admit.

“Was the dick phenomenal?” says Shay.

“It was … nothing to complain about. It was regular, but definitely not bad.”

“Did he make you come?” DeShaun blurts out so loud he draws the attention of the bouncer next to us.

“He didn’t make me come, but I did come,” I answer, and Juliana doesn’t hesitate to pounce.

“Girl, there is a major difference between him making you come, and you coming. If you’re having to make yourself come, you’re basically just using his body to help you masturbate. He’s supposed to be able to make you come.”

“Preach,” DeShaun says, raising his hands like he’s in church.

“Amen, sister,” Shay agrees, nodding her pretty head as she plays with her straight brown hair.

“I know, but Vance wasn’t equipped to make me come, alright?” I say suddenly, as the alcohol starts to have its way with me. “I need more than that vanilla shit.”

Even with the music blaring and the bass humming through the walls, it feels like our entire section suddenly goes silent as the group stares at me with wide eyes. I probably shouldn’t elaborate, but the liquid courage has been activated and I’m feeling wide open.

“Umm, you need more than that vanilla shit?” Juliana says, and it’s almost like she’s asking if I really just said what it sounded like, and am I sure I want to go there.

“What? I do,” I answer, shrugging as the line between my darkness and who I am in public becomes blurred by the liquor in my system. “Vance could never make me come, so I always had to get on top so I could do it myself. I swear, it was like he was holding a grudge against my clit, because he didn’t want to come anywhere near it. It annoyed me, and it didn’t help that I just got to a point where I needed more than what he could give.”

“Oh, don’t stop now, girl. Spill that tea,” DeShaun says, and a wide grin on his face lets me know I have his full attention.

“Are you trying to say Vance wasn’t kinky enough for you?” Shay asks, and I shrug again.