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Back The Infinite Noise Save as PDF
Chapters (70)
  1. Title Page
  2. Copyright Notice
  3. Dedication
  4. 1
  5. 2
  6. 3
  7. 4
  8. 5
  9. 6
  10. 7
  11. 8
  12. 9
  13. 10
  14. 11
  15. 12
  16. 13
  17. 14
  18. 15
  19. 16
  20. 17
  21. 18
  22. 19
  23. 20
  24. 21
  25. 22
  26. 23
  27. 24
  28. 25
  29. 26
  30. 27
  31. 28
  32. 29
  33. 30
  34. 31
  35. 32
  36. 33
  37. 34
  38. 35
  39. 36
  40. 37
  41. 38
  42. 39
  43. 40
  44. 41
  45. 42
  46. 43
  47. 44
  48. 45
  49. 46
  50. 47
  51. 48
  52. 49
  53. 50
  54. 51
  55. 52
  56. 53
  57. 54
  58. 55
  59. 56
  60. 57
  61. 58
  62. 59
  63. 60
  64. 61
  65. 62
  66. 63
  67. 64
  68. ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
  69. ABOUT THE AUTHOR
  70. Newsletter Sign-up

“Well, you’re a total meathead,” he says and laughs.

“But such a good-looking meathead,” I offer, Adam’s affection making me feel confident in a way I never feel without him. He just laughs at that, shaking his head and leaning in to kiss me again. But his hunger for more information itches, distracting me.

“I think it’s nice you’re curious about it,” I say, laying my head back down on the ground. “I can ask Dr. Bright about it if you want.”

“Do you think she’d tell you anything?” he asks, running his free hand through my hair. He does that a lot.

“I don’t know,” I say.

“Hm.”

“What?”

The fire is turning cold, pulling inward from my limbs to sit in my stomach, hard and light like titanium. Determination.

“I have an idea.”

41

ADAM

I don’t actually expect Caleb to go along with my half-baked idea, but he does. He hears me out, fiddling with the watch on my wrist where it rests over his heart, as he nods along with my proposal. I think he starts to tune out my rambling at one point, because his eyes soften and seem to get stuck on my mouth, which makes my stomach do somersaults. But he finally catches up because he says:

“You want to spy on my therapist?”

“Spying is such an ugly word.” I smirk. He smirks back and, just like that, we’re off to the races.

The next three weeks are a total dream. Not only do I have a boyfriend (Is that what he is? We haven’t actually defined anything but that’s what I’m calling him in my thoughts because it makes the oft-dormant pleasure centers of my brain light up), but he’s kind of a superhero. I guess there’s never been a “Mr. Empath” or “Super Emotion Man” but the point is: Caleb isn’t fully human. And that is just. So. Cool.

While I am curious about Dr. Bright’s other patients—and Dr. Bright herself, though I don’t think we’re quite at the point where I can just introduce myself to Caleb’s therapist—I mostly want a concrete excuse to be around Caleb. It’s not like there was ever a concrete excuse before—we would just hang out. But now that we’re … whatever we are, I want to have an activity. A reason for Caleb to keep spending time with me. Because there is no way that Caleb wanting to kiss me and talk to me and be around me is going to last. It feels too much like a dream in the self-deluding sense.