While we had our awkward moments before, there’s a new kind of uncertainty that pops up between us now. Things had been … tense for a while and now I know why: the double whammy of reciprocated-but-not-confessed romantic feelings and hiding a freakin’ superpower. But Caleb is still tentative around me. Even though he doesn’t try and stop himself mid-sentence anymore, I think he’s worried he’s going to spook me if he shares too much. Which is just … well, the irony is not lost on me.

We’re sitting on a bench in the small park across from Dr. Bright’s office, conducting our second “stakeout,” though really, we’re paying more attention to each other than the comings and goings of her patients. And here’s one of the ways that Caleb is more hesitant: he blushes a lot more now when he flirts, like being intentional about it is embarrassing. I try to tease him about it but, of course, he has to go all sincere on me.

“I’m still getting used to it, I guess,” he says into his lap, cheeks red at my laughter.

“Used to what?” I ask, a little breathless.

“Feeling happy,” he says, and my breath hitches. “You feeling happy.” My breath stops completely as those green eyes look up, earnest and probing.

“How did I feel before?” I ask, not really wanting to know the answer. Now I’m the one looking away, uncertain where this conversation is going to lead but knowing it’s probably nowhere good.

Caleb must be able to tell, because he says, “We don’t have to talk about this. I know it’s weird.”

“No, come on, I want to know,” I plead, like the masochistic idiot I am.

“I mean … you were sad a lot. And lonely.” He drapes his arm over the back of the bench, his fingertips brushing my shoulder. The stray thought pops into my head that Caleb would make a good doctor—excellent bedside manner.

“You could feel that?” I ask quietly.

“What, you weren’t lonely?” There’s hope in his voice. He knows the answer, better than anyone, but he still hopes it isn’t true. It makes all of my insides ache.

“No, I was,” I admit, “I just didn’t realize ‘lonely’ was an emotion.”

“Oh yeah, it totally is.” Caleb nods, a little more surefooted. He likes explaining his ability to me. “But there’s different kinds. When I get lonely, I get really, really sad and kind of, I don’t know, hopeless, I guess? You felt … tired with it, if that makes sense.”