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Back The Infinite Noise Save as PDF
Chapters (70)
  1. Title Page
  2. Copyright Notice
  3. Dedication
  4. 1
  5. 2
  6. 3
  7. 4
  8. 5
  9. 6
  10. 7
  11. 8
  12. 9
  13. 10
  14. 11
  15. 12
  16. 13
  17. 14
  18. 15
  19. 16
  20. 17
  21. 18
  22. 19
  23. 20
  24. 21
  25. 22
  26. 23
  27. 24
  28. 25
  29. 26
  30. 27
  31. 28
  32. 29
  33. 30
  34. 31
  35. 32
  36. 33
  37. 34
  38. 35
  39. 36
  40. 37
  41. 38
  42. 39
  43. 40
  44. 41
  45. 42
  46. 43
  47. 44
  48. 45
  49. 46
  50. 47
  51. 48
  52. 49
  53. 50
  54. 51
  55. 52
  56. 53
  57. 54
  58. 55
  59. 56
  60. 57
  61. 58
  62. 59
  63. 60
  64. 61
  65. 62
  66. 63
  67. 64
  68. ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
  69. ABOUT THE AUTHOR
  70. Newsletter Sign-up

“So, the bench behind the gym?” he deflects. “I’ll see you there.” He puts the biology textbook in his bag and slams his locker.

“Okay, yeah, see you there,” I say, feeling off-balance by the whole exchange, but not hating it.

He rushes away and as I’m watching him walk down the hall, he turns his head slightly over his shoulder, like he’s checking to see that I’m really here. He sees that I’m staring and the smallest smile crosses his mostly confused face. Something in my stomach flutters awake and I don’t know if it’s his feeling or mine but, for once, I don’t really care.

18

ADAM

Did I enter some kind of alternate universe when I walked into school this semester? There’s no way that Caleb Michaels—Caleb Michaels—just asked me to eat lunch with him. That’s something that happens to Daydream Adam. Daydream Adam is the person I think about when I’m walking home or Mr. Collins is lecturing about something I’ve already read five times. Daydream Adam never gets bothered by Bryce, he doesn’t stress about schoolwork, he doesn’t get depressed, he doesn’t hurt himself. Daydream Adam is cool and confident and beat Caitlin to the punch in asking Caleb out. Daydream Adam has his life together.

Real Adam is hyperventilating in a bathroom stall for the second time in as many weeks. I’m going to be late for class—again—but I can’t really be fussed to care. In less than an hour I will be having lunch with Caleb. Caleb who helped me get my textbook out of my locker’s clutches like some sort of teen-movie heartthrob. Caleb who was awkward and infuriatingly adorable as he talked about Pizza Wednesday.

Maybe he won’t show up. Maybe this is all some cruel joke. That seems like the most likely explanation, despite the fact that Caleb doesn’t seem cruel.

But maybe …

Maybe he meant it. Maybe Caleb really does want to get to know me.

I honestly don’t know which outcome scares me more.

19

CALEB

“Uh, is right here okay?” I ask, gesturing to the picnic bench table with my cafeteria tray. I don’t know why I’m asking, I told him to meet me out here, but then we ran into each other on our way outside and I’m just trying to fill the silence.

God, why did I do this? I don’t have lunch with people. I eat with the team on Fridays but the rest of the time I come out here and listen to music. It’s the break in my day that makes the rest of school even slightly tolerable, and here I am awkwardly forcing social interaction instead. The day is unseasonably warm and I can’t tell if it’s that or standing next to Adam that’s making me sweat under my jacket.