I wanted to go home and mull over the day in peace but realised I had better be in the forest. I was a new member of the hunting crew and ought to get to know them better. If only to make them stop thinking up new challenges for me.

When all was done the elks flayed and hung from the chain hoists it was late almost nighttime. The fire heating the sauna was stacked high with burning wood. Elk tongue was simmering in salty water flavoured with bay leaves.

We sat on wooden seats around a camp fire grilling marrowbones while we waited for the sauna to get hot enough. Endtoend storytelling around the circle. Mostly old hunting anecdotes that would be retold for ever. The young were the most intent listeners. As yet they lacked the experiences that would eventually turn into new hunters’ tales.

What about you then jana said göranbäckström who wouldn’t leave well alone. It must have been a long time since you went out with the hunt. A bit rusty handling a gun aren’t you.

I had no trouble seeing what he was after. It disturbed the group if someone disputed what was fair prey. Created a bad atmosphere.

You do what you do I said. I respect that. You make your own decisions but as for me I won’t shoot a cow with calf. Or for that matter a cow without calf. Because it’s stupid I felt like adding 190but kept my mouth shut. Göranbäckström was out looking for things to annoy him.

Here he said holding out a bottle of beer. You did the field dressing well anyway. He raised the bottle in a toast. Looked at me for a little too long.

We piled into the sauna. Göranbäckström had no inhibitions about stripping and climbed starkers up to the top bench. The others used towels as loincloths. I wrapped the towel round my whole body but felt as out of place as if I had been wearing a burka. The heat was intense even though I sat on the lowermost bench. Much groaning from higher up. But they still scooped on more water.

There was no shower so those who wanted a wash had to do it with the water in the buckets inside the sauna. I pondered what to do next. Sweat was pouring down my body. Elk blood still stuck to my arms even though I had tried to clean it off with coldwater as soon as we got back from the forest. The beer had made the men braver. One by one the dropped their towels and washed themselves without taking any notice of me. In the end I followed their example. Got rid of the towel and scrubbed the blood off my arms until the skin burned. After all I didn’t have that much to show.

Then we ate and played cards.