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Chapters (77)
  1. Cover
  2. Dedication
  3. 1
  4. 2
  5. A Series of Screw-ups: The Chisaki Joan Katsuyama Story, Part I
  6. 3
  7. The History of My Beef with Brynn Foer-Preston
  8. 4
  9. 5
  10. 6
  11. 7
  12. The History of the Katsuyama Family, Part I
  13. 8
  14. 9
  15. A Brief History of Chisaki Joan Katsuyama’s Romantic Learning Opportunities, Part I
  16. 10
  17. 11
  18. 12
  19. A Brief History of Chisaki Joan Katsuyama’s Romantic Learning Opportunities, Part II
  20. 13
  21. The History of the Katsuyama Family, Part II
  22. 14
  23. 15
  24. 16
  25. 17
  26. 18
  27. 19
  28. The Complicated History of Chisaki Joan Katsuyama’s Imaginary Relationship with Her Nonexistent Dad
  29. 20
  30. 21
  31. 22
  32. A Brief History of Chisaki Joan Katsuyama’s Romantic Learning Opportunities, Part III
  33. 23
  34. 24
  35. 25
  36. A Brief, Backward History of the McAllister Family, as Paraphrased from the San Jose Mercury News
  37. 26
  38. 27
  39. 28
  40. A Quick and Eerily Relevant History of Asians in America
  41. 29
  42. 30
  43. 31
  44. 32
  45. 33
  46. 34
  47. 35
  48. 36
  49. A Brief History of Chisaki Joan Katsuyama’s Romantic Learning Opportunities, Part IV
  50. 37
  51. 38
  52. 39
  53. 40
  54. 41
  55. 42
  56. 43
  57. 44
  58. A Series of Screw-ups: The Chisaki Joan Katsuyama Story, Part II (Or Maybe It’s a Prequel)
  59. 45
  60. 46
  61. 47
  62. 48
  63. 49
  64. 50
  65. 51
  66. 52
  67. 53
  68. The History of the Katsuyama Family, Part III
  69. 54
  70. A Note from the Author
  71. Index of Flowers and their Meanings
  72. Acknowledgments
  73. About the Author
  74. Praise for This Time Will Be Different
  75. Books by Misa Sugiura
  76. Back Ad
  77. About the Publisher

“I don’t know,” I say. I’m afraid to let go of her. I feel like she’s holding me together. “That was supposed to be our moment of triumph, and Trey just, like, dismissed us like we didn’t even matter.”

She releases me, and it’s Owen’s turn. “It was our moment of triumph,” he says. “Right?”

The others murmur their assent.

“You have the video?” Mizhir asks Nikki.

“Right here,” says Nikki. “And I sent the email with our statement. He can pretend this was all his idea and look good, or we can tell everyone that we gave him the opportunity and he turned it down.”

It all feels like false hope to me. But I don’t want to be a downer, so I smile and say they’re probably right.

On the way home with Owen, though, I can’t hold back. “This was a huge mistake. We never should have tried it. Did you see my mom? She’s never going to forgive me.”

“She saw you standing up for what you believe, Ceej. She saw you being proactive and going after your vision. All the stuff you said she loves. She can’t be mad about that.”

“She saw me sabotage her goals and she saw me fail, is what she saw.”

Owen sighs and doesn’t try to argue with me anymore. But he stops at Heart’s Desire and makes me come inside with him.

Hannah gives me a hug and a cup of coltsfoot tea (for justice, she says). After a whispered consultation with her, Owen disappears into the storeroom and brings back three irises and a Monterey pine cone left over from our golf course caper, all tied together with a ribbon. “There weren’t any green pine branches,” he says apologetically. The irises are for a noble heart and the pine cone substitute means “hope in adversity.”

His impromptu arrangement is clumsy, hopeful, heartfelt—a lot like what we just did at McAllister VC. It’s enough to win me over, but I have my doubts about anyone else.

53

I SPEND THE REST OF THE EVENING AT OWEN’S house; I can’t bear to face Mom after the way I flamed out this afternoon. To be honest, I don’t know if I’d be able to face her if I’d totally crushed it, either.

When Owen finally drives me home at ten, all the lights in the house are off. We kiss for a while in the truck; finally, he says, “Time for you to go.”

“Do I have to?” I kiss his square jaw, his ears. “Can’t I go back home with you?”

“Believe me, I wish you could.” He gives me one more long, sweet kiss, and pushes me gently away from him. “Good night, Ceej. I’ll see you tomorrow.”