Chapters (75)
- Cover
- Praise
- About the Author
- Title Page
- Intoroduction
- ONE
- TWO
- THREE
- FOUR
- FIVE
- SIX
- SEVEN
- EITHT
- NINE
- TEN
- ELEVEN
- TWELVE
- THIRTEEN
- FOURTEEN
- FIFTEEN
- SIXTEEN
- SEVENTEEN
- EIGHTEEN
- NINETEEN
- TWENTY
- TWENTY-ONE
- TWENTY-TWO
- TWENTY-THREE
- TWENTY-FOUR
- TWENTY-FIVE
- TWENTY-SIX
- TWENTY-SEVEN
- TWENTY-EIGHT
- TWENTY-NINE
- THIRTY
- THIRTY-ONE
- THIRTY-TWO
- THIRTY-THREE
- THIRTY-FOUR
- THIRTY-FIVE
- THIRTY-SIX
- THIRTY-SEVEN
- THIRTY-EIGHT
- THIRTY-NINE
- FORTY
- FORTY-ONE
- FORTY-TWO
- FORTY-THREE
- FORTY-FOUR
- FORTY-FIVE
- FORTY-SIX
- FORTY-SEVEN
- FORTY-EIGHT
- FORTY-NINE
- FIFTY
- FIFTY-ONE
- FIFTY-TWO
- FIFTY-THREE
- FIFTY-FOUR
- FIFTY-FIVE
- FIFTY-SIX
- FIFTY-SEVEN
- FIFTY-EIGHT
- FIFTY-NINE
- SIXTY
- SIXTY-ONE
- SIXTY-TWO
- SIXTY-THREE
- SIXTY-FOUR
- SIXTY-FIVE
- SIXTY-SIX
- SIXTY-SEVEN
- ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
- CLIMATE EMERGENCY
- Copyright
I think about it. Mum won’t be home this evening; Fridays are when she goes to see her parents. She’s stopped insisting that I come with her ever since we’ve started GCSEs, so I’ll be on my own. And will be until Sunday morning, probably. So Mum wouldn’t have to know about this. Not that she’d have a problem at all, I just know she’d make a big fuss and say things like ‘it’s good that you’re getting out again’ or ‘will there be girls there’ or, even worse, ‘fine, I’ll just sit in on my own’.
I throw my pencil at Jamie’s shoulder. It glances off, clatters across the desk in front of him. He turns around.
‘What time?’
‘Er … after half eight?’
‘Josh. Stop talking,’ hisses Mrs Burgoyne from the front, and I’m not sure if she or Jamie is more surprised.
NINE
NINE
Since Mum hasn’t changed the shopping list for a while, we’ve got a good supply of beer in the garage, all stacked up. Dad was the only one who drank it. There are bottles at the back that are probably off by now. I grab two four-packs from the top and replace them with a few packs of cokes a little further down so that the tower of beer stays the same height. I doubt Mum would mind if she knew I was taking them, but it saves time this way, and I don’t want to phone her at my grandparents’ house. It’s never a short conversation.
Nanna and Grandad have been really good for Mum, and are happy that I’m mostly ‘keeping out of it’ as they say. After it happened, they were coming over a lot, so much that I started calling the spare room their room. But they have lives like the rest of us, so before too long their visits got less frequent. Now Mum goes there instead whenever she feels like she needs a rest. Which is every weekend. And sometimes during the week.
She’s never mentioned moving house, but I’ve seen her browser history and I know she’d like it if we went to live near them. I think she’s just waiting until I finish school. Or this part of it, at least.
I sling a pizza in the oven while I go upstairs for a shower, stuffing it down before I leave the house, the beers clinking in a carrier bag.
For some reason, as I walk the short and familiar route to Jamie’s, I’m nervous. There’s a knot in my stomach like I used to get before kick-offs. It’s half excitement and half dead-weight, and it pulls me down and makes me want to turn around, go home and just curl up on the sofa all evening watching chat shows and online videos.