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Chapters (75)
  1. Cover
  2. Praise
  3. About the Author
  4. Title Page
  5. Intoroduction
  6. ONE
  7. TWO
  8. THREE
  9. FOUR
  10. FIVE
  11. SIX
  12. SEVEN
  13. EITHT
  14. NINE
  15. TEN
  16. ELEVEN
  17. TWELVE
  18. THIRTEEN
  19. FOURTEEN
  20. FIFTEEN
  21. SIXTEEN
  22. SEVENTEEN
  23. EIGHTEEN
  24. NINETEEN
  25. TWENTY
  26. TWENTY-ONE
  27. TWENTY-TWO
  28. TWENTY-THREE
  29. TWENTY-FOUR
  30. TWENTY-FIVE
  31. TWENTY-SIX
  32. TWENTY-SEVEN
  33. TWENTY-EIGHT
  34. TWENTY-NINE
  35. THIRTY
  36. THIRTY-ONE
  37. THIRTY-TWO
  38. THIRTY-THREE
  39. THIRTY-FOUR
  40. THIRTY-FIVE
  41. THIRTY-SIX
  42. THIRTY-SEVEN
  43. THIRTY-EIGHT
  44. THIRTY-NINE
  45. FORTY
  46. FORTY-ONE
  47. FORTY-TWO
  48. FORTY-THREE
  49. FORTY-FOUR
  50. FORTY-FIVE
  51. FORTY-SIX
  52. FORTY-SEVEN
  53. FORTY-EIGHT
  54. FORTY-NINE
  55. FIFTY
  56. FIFTY-ONE
  57. FIFTY-TWO
  58. FIFTY-THREE
  59. FIFTY-FOUR
  60. FIFTY-FIVE
  61. FIFTY-SIX
  62. FIFTY-SEVEN
  63. FIFTY-EIGHT
  64. FIFTY-NINE
  65. SIXTY
  66. SIXTY-ONE
  67. SIXTY-TWO
  68. SIXTY-THREE
  69. SIXTY-FOUR
  70. SIXTY-FIVE
  71. SIXTY-SIX
  72. SIXTY-SEVEN
  73. ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
  74. CLIMATE EMERGENCY
  75. Copyright

This evening, I’ve chosen a comedy. It’s about a couple of policemen who are partnered together when they shouldn’t be, and they have to bust a drugs ring. There’s a couple of car chases early on, so it’s pretty close to her tolerance levels. I’m not surprised when she gets up and goes to bed half an hour in.

So I do too.

In my room, I turn on my laptop and carry on watching the film. It’s not very good, but I don’t feel like sleeping.

An email alert pops up in the bottom corner of my screen. It’s from my school account, which I haven’t used in years. There was a big IT initiative when I started at school, and we were all told to sync our mailboxes at home. But after the first year, it all kind of fell away. It was a bit useful when teachers were emailing me work after Dad died, I suppose. Though I ignored most of them.

The sender’s address is one I don’t recognise – a list of letters and numbers. It looks like spam, but then I see the email subject. That video you liked.

I open it, and there’s a link to a private website with a bunch of videos. The first one is the one that Alan showed me this afternoon. In a mid-film daze, I watch again as the grey, hooded head of Dana’s boyfriend chases down the turbaned head of a stranger, and I listen again to the muffled sounds of his crying. The video ends this time with a close up of Carl’s face, turning to look straight into the camera a few seconds after the group have all run down the street. Well, it’s his mouth at least. The top half of his face is part covered by his hood, and the rest is in shadow. If you didn’t know who it was, it’d be impossible to tell. But his jaw seems rigid with anger. It’s as if it’s in his bones. I feel I should turn it off, now, delete the email and go to sleep. But I can also see something like satisfaction in his half-smile, his gritted-teeth, angry grin.

I’ve been looking at it for a few minutes when Mum knocks on my half-open door. I jump a little, the headphones slipping from my ears.

‘How’d it finish?’

‘What?’

‘The film, love. How did it finish? Any good?’

‘No.’ I breathe a little easier. ‘Not really. As you’d expect, I guess.’

‘It is what it is,’ Mum says, pulling the door closed. ‘Good night.’

EIGHTEEN

EIGHTEEN

The next day, Jamie catches me after English and asks if I want to come and watch the old team play tomorrow morning. It’s a home game, district cup, first round. I say that I might.