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Chapters (86)
  1. Title Page
  2. CONTENTS
  3. Love
  4. Before
  5. One
  6. ONE
  7. Two
  8. TWO
  9. Three
  10. THREE
  11. Four
  12. FOUR
  13. Five
  14. FIVE
  15. Six
  16. SIX
  17. Seven
  18. SEVEN
  19. Eight
  20. EIGHT
  21. Nine
  22. NINE
  23. Ten
  24. TEN
  25. Eleven
  26. ELEVEN
  27. After
  28. One
  29. ONE
  30. Two
  31. TWO
  32. Three
  33. THREE
  34. Four
  35. FOUR
  36. Five
  37. FIVE
  38. Six
  39. SIX
  40. Seven
  41. SEVEN
  42. Eight
  43. EIGHT
  44. Nine
  45. NINE
  46. Ten
  47. TEN
  48. Eleven
  49. ELEVEN
  50. Twelve
  51. TWELVE
  52. Thirteen
  53. THIRTEEN
  54. Fourteen
  55. FOURTEEN
  56. Fifteen
  57. FIFTEEN
  58. Sixteen
  59. SIXTEEN
  60. Seventeen
  61. SEVENTEEN
  62. Eighteen
  63. EIGHTEEN
  64. Nineteen
  65. NINETEEN
  66. Twenty
  67. TWENTY
  68. Twenty-One
  69. TWENTY-ONE
  70. Twenty-Two
  71. TWENTY-TWO
  72. Twenty-Three
  73. TWENTY-THREE
  74. Twenty-Four
  75. TWENTY-FOUR
  76. Twenty-Five
  77. TWENTY-FIVE
  78. Twenty-Six
  79. TWENTY-SIX
  80. Twenty-Seven
  81. TWENTY-SEVEN
  82. Twenty-Eight
  83. TWENTY-EIGHT
  84. Eleven Months Later
  85. ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
  86. Copyright

‘Fair enough.’ Poppy nods. ‘Listen. Don’t worry. I know your mum is pissed that you snuck out tonight, but when she calms down, I’ll come over for dinner and charm the socks off her. I’m great with parents.’ She stops to tilt her head from side to side. ‘Everyone else’s but my own. Speaking of.’ She raises her eyebrows at me. ‘I almost told my mother about you as well before Christmas.’

‘Yeah?’ I ask, biting down on my bottom lip as it quivers.

‘The last time I spoke to her she said I sounded different. Happy.’

‘How do they notice this stuff when no one else does?’

She looks at me as if to say, Right? then says, ‘So I almost told her why I was so happy, but she was in Boston and I didn’t want to tell her about you over the phone, you know?’

I nod.

‘So I’m going to tell her now.’

‘What? Now now?’

‘Now now. I’m going to go home now and tell her.’

My heart flutters at the thought. ‘You sure?’

‘Absolutely.’ She nods, finding my gaze and holding it. ‘Do you know grateful I am to you, Ash?’

I blink at her. ‘Me?’

‘Yes, you. I was in such a bad way when we met.’ Her gaze dips and when she trails off, my heart starts to beat very, very slowly. ‘I was so sad, but then I met you.’ When she looks up at me with a slow smile, my heart speeds up again, twice as fast. ‘And I know it isn’t up to you to fix that. What is it that Amy Poehler says? Other people are not medicine? She’s right, but the day I met you, it was like a light turned on and I could see everything in magnificent, magical technicolour. You didn’t fix me, only I can do that, but you made me care about stuff again, you know?’

I nod.

I know.

‘You made me want to walk down roads I’ve never been on just to see where they lead. Discover a café and claim it as our own.’ She smiles to herself at the memory and I can’t help but do the same. ‘You made me plant flags all over Brighton and say, That’s ours. And you made me want to do that all over the world, in every corner, because I can see a future. Memories. Stories. And I want it. I want all of it. I want to do and see everything.’

I just stare at her because I don’t know what to say.

I thought she was the one who did that for me.

It hadn’t even occurred to me that I was doing the same for her.