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Back Afterlove Save as PDF
Chapters (86)
  1. Title Page
  2. CONTENTS
  3. Love
  4. Before
  5. One
  6. ONE
  7. Two
  8. TWO
  9. Three
  10. THREE
  11. Four
  12. FOUR
  13. Five
  14. FIVE
  15. Six
  16. SIX
  17. Seven
  18. SEVEN
  19. Eight
  20. EIGHT
  21. Nine
  22. NINE
  23. Ten
  24. TEN
  25. Eleven
  26. ELEVEN
  27. After
  28. One
  29. ONE
  30. Two
  31. TWO
  32. Three
  33. THREE
  34. Four
  35. FOUR
  36. Five
  37. FIVE
  38. Six
  39. SIX
  40. Seven
  41. SEVEN
  42. Eight
  43. EIGHT
  44. Nine
  45. NINE
  46. Ten
  47. TEN
  48. Eleven
  49. ELEVEN
  50. Twelve
  51. TWELVE
  52. Thirteen
  53. THIRTEEN
  54. Fourteen
  55. FOURTEEN
  56. Fifteen
  57. FIFTEEN
  58. Sixteen
  59. SIXTEEN
  60. Seventeen
  61. SEVENTEEN
  62. Eighteen
  63. EIGHTEEN
  64. Nineteen
  65. NINETEEN
  66. Twenty
  67. TWENTY
  68. Twenty-One
  69. TWENTY-ONE
  70. Twenty-Two
  71. TWENTY-TWO
  72. Twenty-Three
  73. TWENTY-THREE
  74. Twenty-Four
  75. TWENTY-FOUR
  76. Twenty-Five
  77. TWENTY-FIVE
  78. Twenty-Six
  79. TWENTY-SIX
  80. Twenty-Seven
  81. TWENTY-SEVEN
  82. Twenty-Eight
  83. TWENTY-EIGHT
  84. Eleven Months Later
  85. ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
  86. Copyright

‘She doesn’t know. That’s why she needs to do research about it.’

‘Do you want me to take you to the library tomorrow, Rosh, or not?’

She turns to me then pretends to lock her mouth and throw away the key.

‘How was your day, Dad?’ I ask at last. ‘Did you plant lots of pretty flowers?’

‘It’s mostly cutting back at this time of year, but I did sow some poppies, actually.’

I immediately flush from my scalp to my toes and when he glares at me, I think he knows why, but he nods at the damp towel in my lap. ‘When were you in the shower?’

‘Just now.’

‘How long for?’

‘Two hours and forty-seven minutes.’

He ignores me. ‘I hope there’s some hot water left,’ he mutters as he heads to the bathroom.

Me too.

‘Better sort dinner,’ I realise, saying a little prayer that there’s been enough time for the water to reheat when I hear my father turn on the shower.

As I’m about to stand up, though, I see the screen of my phone light up next to me and my heart throws itself against my ribs as I snatch it off the bed.

Glad you’re not going to jump. I’d miss you. Let’s celebrate your newfound will to live with coffee and maybe some cake too. How’s Monday after school? Poppy xx

Five

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FIVE

I reply telling Poppy that Monday afternoon works and she responds immediately to ask what time. So I reply and that’s how it goes for the rest of the weekend, the pair of us WhatsApping back and forth, back and forth. There’s no time to think – or overthink, in my case – no time to agonise over what I’m going to say or question if I’ve said something stupid. I just say it and I’ve barely caught my breath before she’s replied, asking something else, and I daren’t hesitate in case she thinks I’ve lost interest.

Or worse, she does.

She doesn’t, though, and it’s just so easy. We talk about everything. School. What we’re watching on TV. What music we’re listening to. The old couple she sees on the nudist beach doing t’ai chi. The woman I pass pushing an elderly pug in a Silver Cross pram down Marine Parade. She sends me a selfie in the library at Roedean, surreptitiously pulling a face at the librarian who’s just told her to put her phone away. And I send her one when I’m in the library with Rosh, posing with a book on cognitive dissonance.