Chapters (86)
- Title Page
- CONTENTS
- Love
- Before
- One
- ONE
- Two
- TWO
- Three
- THREE
- Four
- FOUR
- Five
- FIVE
- Six
- SIX
- Seven
- SEVEN
- Eight
- EIGHT
- Nine
- NINE
- Ten
- TEN
- Eleven
- ELEVEN
- After
- One
- ONE
- Two
- TWO
- Three
- THREE
- Four
- FOUR
- Five
- FIVE
- Six
- SIX
- Seven
- SEVEN
- Eight
- EIGHT
- Nine
- NINE
- Ten
- TEN
- Eleven
- ELEVEN
- Twelve
- TWELVE
- Thirteen
- THIRTEEN
- Fourteen
- FOURTEEN
- Fifteen
- FIFTEEN
- Sixteen
- SIXTEEN
- Seventeen
- SEVENTEEN
- Eighteen
- EIGHTEEN
- Nineteen
- NINETEEN
- Twenty
- TWENTY
- Twenty-One
- TWENTY-ONE
- Twenty-Two
- TWENTY-TWO
- Twenty-Three
- TWENTY-THREE
- Twenty-Four
- TWENTY-FOUR
- Twenty-Five
- TWENTY-FIVE
- Twenty-Six
- TWENTY-SIX
- Twenty-Seven
- TWENTY-SEVEN
- Twenty-Eight
- TWENTY-EIGHT
- Eleven Months Later
- ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
- Copyright
I feel the tiniest spark of hope as I remember what my mother said the other night when she took my phone – No girls until after your GCSEs – and I give into the smile tugging at the corners of my mouth.
‘Of course she will. She just needs a minute. My mother’s first reaction is to say no to everything. Then she thinks about it for a couple of days and comes around. I mean, if she’s like that about me going to the cinema with Adara, it’s gonna take more than a couple of days for her to come around to me being gay.’
I laugh and when Poppy does the same, she’s back to her usual playful self.
‘Are you gonna tell her about me?’
‘When there’s something to tell.’
Her smile sharpens into a smirk. ‘I like a challenge. So are you . . .’
‘A lesbian?’ I finish her thought with a nod. ‘Yeah. I thought I was bi for a while, but that’s only because Zayn Malik had me fucked up for a minute there. Then I realised he was the only one.’ I shrug again. ‘You?’
‘Same. I’m strictly clitly.’
‘Poppy!’ I gasp, covering my mouth with my free hand.
‘What?’ She cackles shamelessly as we turn and walk up Kensington Gardens, her hand still in mine. ‘That’s what I led with when I told my parents.’
‘So you’re out as well?’
‘Yeah. I told them last year. Apparently, fifteen is the right age to tell your daughter about the birds and the bees. So I said they shouldn’t bother telling me about the bees, just the birds.’
I can’t help but laugh at that. ‘What happened?’
‘They weren’t surprised.’ She lifts her shoulder and lets it drop again. ‘My father always assumed my best friend Charlotte and I were, you know.’ She waggles her eyebrows. ‘But we were just close, like you and Adara. That’s why I’ve only come out to a few friends I trust. I go to an all-girls’ boarding school, don’t I?’ She turns to me, eyes wide. ‘I don’t want everyone to think I fancy them just because I’m talking to them.’
I get that.
‘I can’t complain.’ She flicks her hair with another shrug. ‘My parents reacted exactly how they should have. They were kind and compassionate and let me know that they still loved me and I know Mum does. She has such an open mind. She knows that the earth is just a pale-blue dot on a limitless cosmic canvas. If she knows that, how can she not consider the possibility that somewhere out there, there’s another species, just like us, that, when they’re born, they’re not told that they’re male or female or heterosexual or whatever and are just allowed to work it out for themselves. Wouldn’t that be nice?’
It would.