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Back Afterlove
Chapters (86)
  1. Title Page
  2. CONTENTS
  3. Love
  4. Before
  5. One
  6. ONE
  7. Two
  8. TWO
  9. Three
  10. THREE
  11. Four
  12. FOUR
  13. Five
  14. FIVE
  15. Six
  16. SIX
  17. Seven
  18. SEVEN
  19. Eight
  20. EIGHT
  21. Nine
  22. NINE
  23. Ten
  24. TEN
  25. Eleven
  26. ELEVEN
  27. After
  28. One
  29. ONE
  30. Two
  31. TWO
  32. Three
  33. THREE
  34. Four
  35. FOUR
  36. Five
  37. FIVE
  38. Six
  39. SIX
  40. Seven
  41. SEVEN
  42. Eight
  43. EIGHT
  44. Nine
  45. NINE
  46. Ten
  47. TEN
  48. Eleven
  49. ELEVEN
  50. Twelve
  51. TWELVE
  52. Thirteen
  53. THIRTEEN
  54. Fourteen
  55. FOURTEEN
  56. Fifteen
  57. FIFTEEN
  58. Sixteen
  59. SIXTEEN
  60. Seventeen
  61. SEVENTEEN
  62. Eighteen
  63. EIGHTEEN
  64. Nineteen
  65. NINETEEN
  66. Twenty
  67. TWENTY
  68. Twenty-One
  69. TWENTY-ONE
  70. Twenty-Two
  71. TWENTY-TWO
  72. Twenty-Three
  73. TWENTY-THREE
  74. Twenty-Four
  75. TWENTY-FOUR
  76. Twenty-Five
  77. TWENTY-FIVE
  78. Twenty-Six
  79. TWENTY-SIX
  80. Twenty-Seven
  81. TWENTY-SEVEN
  82. Twenty-Eight
  83. TWENTY-EIGHT
  84. Eleven Months Later
  85. ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
  86. Copyright

She’s been counting down to our coffee all day and she continues to do it every hour or so until the hours become minutes. If Rosh thought I was intense, I now have proof that I’m not the only one.

I all but run out of English Lit when the bell rings. Adara follows, noticeably less excited than I am, but determined not to let me go without saying goodbye. She’s forgiven me for not waiting three days like I was supposed to, but she still gives me a look when she catches up with me at the top of the stairs. I don’t know what it is, if she’s annoyed or wary or nervous, or some combination of the three, but she can’t even bring herself to smile as she follows me down the stairs.

‘Do you want me to come?’ she asks as we push through the double doors, out into the sunshine.

‘Why?’ I frown. ‘Do you really want to third wheel it?’

‘In case she doesn’t turn up.’

I almost trip over my feet as I stop and stare at her, everyone moving around us in their haste to get out the gates and to the corner shop or home or wherever it is they’re going. I can feel the tips of my ears burning as Adara looks at me, her arms crossed, and I want to ask her why she would say such a thing, but I can’t speak. It’s as though I’ve been winded, the thrill I was feeling a few seconds ago knocked clean out of me.

When my breathing steadies and my fingers uncurl at my sides, I realise that she’s isn’t being cruel, she’s being practical. After all, it’s happened before, hasn’t it? Girls not turning up and leaving me to linger outside the cinema for so long that the film we were supposed to see is over before I finally give up hope and go home. Only Adara knows about that, about all the tiny humiliations I’ve endured over the last year or so. But that’s the trouble with best friends, isn’t it? They know everything and forget nothing, no matter how much you want them to.

Sometimes I need Adara to remember these things, though. Like now, when I’m literally running off to meet another girl I barely know, ready to dive head first into what, I don’t know, when I have absolutely no reason to believe that Poppy is any different from the others. I need Adara to remember these things so she can pull me back, to protect me even if I don’t want her to. I just want to fall and see where I land.