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Back This Time Will Be Different Save as PDF
Chapters (77)
  1. Cover
  2. Dedication
  3. 1
  4. 2
  5. A Series of Screw-ups: The Chisaki Joan Katsuyama Story, Part I
  6. 3
  7. The History of My Beef with Brynn Foer-Preston
  8. 4
  9. 5
  10. 6
  11. 7
  12. The History of the Katsuyama Family, Part I
  13. 8
  14. 9
  15. A Brief History of Chisaki Joan Katsuyama’s Romantic Learning Opportunities, Part I
  16. 10
  17. 11
  18. 12
  19. A Brief History of Chisaki Joan Katsuyama’s Romantic Learning Opportunities, Part II
  20. 13
  21. The History of the Katsuyama Family, Part II
  22. 14
  23. 15
  24. 16
  25. 17
  26. 18
  27. 19
  28. The Complicated History of Chisaki Joan Katsuyama’s Imaginary Relationship with Her Nonexistent Dad
  29. 20
  30. 21
  31. 22
  32. A Brief History of Chisaki Joan Katsuyama’s Romantic Learning Opportunities, Part III
  33. 23
  34. 24
  35. 25
  36. A Brief, Backward History of the McAllister Family, as Paraphrased from the San Jose Mercury News
  37. 26
  38. 27
  39. 28
  40. A Quick and Eerily Relevant History of Asians in America
  41. 29
  42. 30
  43. 31
  44. 32
  45. 33
  46. 34
  47. 35
  48. 36
  49. A Brief History of Chisaki Joan Katsuyama’s Romantic Learning Opportunities, Part IV
  50. 37
  51. 38
  52. 39
  53. 40
  54. 41
  55. 42
  56. 43
  57. 44
  58. A Series of Screw-ups: The Chisaki Joan Katsuyama Story, Part II (Or Maybe It’s a Prequel)
  59. 45
  60. 46
  61. 47
  62. 48
  63. 49
  64. 50
  65. 51
  66. 52
  67. 53
  68. The History of the Katsuyama Family, Part III
  69. 54
  70. A Note from the Author
  71. Index of Flowers and their Meanings
  72. Acknowledgments
  73. About the Author
  74. Praise for This Time Will Be Different
  75. Books by Misa Sugiura
  76. Back Ad
  77. About the Publisher

“The others voted on principle. They like Brynn, but they didn’t have patience for her ignorance. I can respect that. But I think you’re more . . . obsessed with your own shit and your own grudges. Sorry, Ceej, but that’s the truth.”

Ouch. But . . . well. When he puts it that way, of course it looks bad.

“I’m sorry, Owen. I just. I’d had enough. She’s done this before and I was tired of putting up with her. Anyway, we don’t need her. I told you if you want white people, I’m sure that Shane and his friends will go to the board meeting. I know that’s cynical, but you’re the one who’s worried about optics.”

“Yeah, about that.” Owen’s hand strays to the back of his head. “Being cynical. It’s pretty obvious that Shane signed the petition because of you. He’d be going to the school board meeting because of you. He’s trying to impress you.”

“What even—that’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard.” I think back to that afternoon in the quad. He did say he’d sign the petition for me. And then he held my hand and I kind of lost my mind. But then he was ready to beat up that little punk, and he said he got it. That couldn’t possibly have been about impressing me. Even if it was, isn’t that a step in the right direction? “Anyway, who cares why he’s there? Brynn wasn’t in this for the right reasons, either.”

“I think she was.”

“I know she wasn’t.”

“You can’t know.”

I suppose not. But I’ve seen Brynn’s dark side, and until I personally see evidence of something different, I refuse to change my position. “Agree to disagree.”

Owen starts hacking absently at the ground again. Without looking at me, he asks, “So are you and Shane like, a thing?”

“Oh my god, what? What does that even have to do with any of this?”

“You are, aren’t you?”

“No, of course not!” Well, probably not. Not yet. No, probably not ever, even. Not really. “Why even does it matter?”

“It matters because—” Owen stops hacking, drops the hoe, and paces in a little circle. He takes a deep breath and grabs two fistfuls of his hair as he lets his breath out in a huff. “God, CJ. I don’t— I can’t—” He lets go of his hair and shakes his head. “I don’t know. You’re right. It doesn’t matter.”

“What. Tell me what you were going to say.”

Owen sighs. “I dunno. I guess I’m feeling a little protective, is all. You know he doesn’t date girls for very long. I don’t want you to be just another bead on a string, you know? You deserve better than that.”