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Back This Time Will Be Different
Chapters (77)
  1. Cover
  2. Dedication
  3. 1
  4. 2
  5. A Series of Screw-ups: The Chisaki Joan Katsuyama Story, Part I
  6. 3
  7. The History of My Beef with Brynn Foer-Preston
  8. 4
  9. 5
  10. 6
  11. 7
  12. The History of the Katsuyama Family, Part I
  13. 8
  14. 9
  15. A Brief History of Chisaki Joan Katsuyama’s Romantic Learning Opportunities, Part I
  16. 10
  17. 11
  18. 12
  19. A Brief History of Chisaki Joan Katsuyama’s Romantic Learning Opportunities, Part II
  20. 13
  21. The History of the Katsuyama Family, Part II
  22. 14
  23. 15
  24. 16
  25. 17
  26. 18
  27. 19
  28. The Complicated History of Chisaki Joan Katsuyama’s Imaginary Relationship with Her Nonexistent Dad
  29. 20
  30. 21
  31. 22
  32. A Brief History of Chisaki Joan Katsuyama’s Romantic Learning Opportunities, Part III
  33. 23
  34. 24
  35. 25
  36. A Brief, Backward History of the McAllister Family, as Paraphrased from the San Jose Mercury News
  37. 26
  38. 27
  39. 28
  40. A Quick and Eerily Relevant History of Asians in America
  41. 29
  42. 30
  43. 31
  44. 32
  45. 33
  46. 34
  47. 35
  48. 36
  49. A Brief History of Chisaki Joan Katsuyama’s Romantic Learning Opportunities, Part IV
  50. 37
  51. 38
  52. 39
  53. 40
  54. 41
  55. 42
  56. 43
  57. 44
  58. A Series of Screw-ups: The Chisaki Joan Katsuyama Story, Part II (Or Maybe It’s a Prequel)
  59. 45
  60. 46
  61. 47
  62. 48
  63. 49
  64. 50
  65. 51
  66. 52
  67. 53
  68. The History of the Katsuyama Family, Part III
  69. 54
  70. A Note from the Author
  71. Index of Flowers and their Meanings
  72. Acknowledgments
  73. About the Author
  74. Praise for This Time Will Be Different
  75. Books by Misa Sugiura
  76. Back Ad
  77. About the Publisher

“I mean. Kind of?” It’s not KKK-level racist, but it still definitely feels, well, wrong. But if I say that, it still sounds like I think Shane is racist. Which I don’t.

“Wait, seriously? But I don’t hate anyone. It’s not like I’m like, ‘Fuck the Japanese Americans’ or some shit like that. I think what McAllister did was fucked up, and I totally get why you don’t want to go to a school named after him. But the name doesn’t affect me, so I’m not upset about it. How does that make me a racist?”

“I’m not saying you’re a racist. It’s just. Like. If you say that it doesn’t affect you . . .” How do I explain? I’ve never really thought about it that carefully. I wish Owen was here. Or—

“I hope you don’t think I’m racist. I’m just trying to understand.” Shane’s whole handsome face is concerned, his blue eyes blinking earnestly at me, and I feel a little surge of affection for him. “I don’t want you to feel weird about going to school here because of some stupid asshole’s name—ohh.” I see a glimmer of understanding dawn on his face. “I get it. Tell you what. I’ll sign the petition. For you. And I’ll get all my buddies to sign it, too.”

“Oh. I mean. Don’t sign it just because of me.” I mean. Do sign it because of me? But also don’t?

“I want to. You’ve convinced me.” Shane smiles at me. “Come on.” He takes both my hands in his and walks backward, leading me toward the petition signing line. “Come with me. You have to sign it, too.”

I almost don’t tell him. I don’t want to be snotty, and he’s trying so hard right now. And he’s holding my hands in his. Like he’s my boyfriend or something. Shane Morgan. But I’m getting frustrated with fading into the woodwork. “Oh. Uh. I wrote it, actually.”

Shane stops walking, his expression confused, then—I swear to God—joyous. “Why didn’t you tell me? Damn!” He puts his non-handholding fist up and I put mine up and we bump fists and he says, “And here I was all, ‘Get more involved! It’ll look good on your college apps!’ Why didn’t you say something? You’re a fucking rock star!”

Shane Morgan: sexy, talented, admires strong, smart women. Thinks I am a rock star. Could he be more perfect? I don’t think so.