‘And your mum said you didn’t know about flights yet, which is great, because I was going to ask you if you wanted to go early, you know? Just us? Chill out. Get massages. It’ll only be a few days but it would be nice, if you can get the time off work. For all that planning, we’ve never gone anywhere together, so I thought …’ Her voice ran out suddenly, and then she just looked at me and the air grew hard, impossible to breathe. There had been nuts on top of my nachos, which didn’t make any culinary sense. It had to be a mistake. A fatal one.

I pushed a smile onto my face and reached for her hand. She gave it to me, too eager.

‘Of course, Leen,’ I said softly. ‘That sounds great. Of course.’

She exhaled, her whole body relaxing.

‘And I’m not mad. I wasn’t mad. I was going to reply,’ I said. ‘I had a postcard.’ I hesitated. ‘I don’t think it’s kids’ stuff.’

She shrugged, and I could tell she didn’t believe me. ‘It doesn’t matter, Cait. It’s fine. Whatever. I just want you there.’

‘I’ll be there. I promise.’

‘And you’ll be my maid of honour? You can pick your dress.’

I laughed. ‘Of course.’

‘Good,’ she said, her voice thick with relief. She picked up her water and took a long sip, then put it down. ‘Thank you.’

‘It’s okay.’

She shook her head, like it wasn’t. ‘I feel as though I never see you anymore. And I know I’m busy with Matt and work, but …’

I looked down at the table, willing her to stop. Sharp edges; a slip and fall could be lethal.

‘It’s like since what happened … I don’t know. We don’t really talk much. I miss you.’

‘We talk all the time,’ I said. But we didn’t. We had at first. After the accident, it was like she was always around, more than she had been in years, calling most days just to say hi, asking what I was doing, and then it was less, and less. I swallowed. Guilt. Not anaphylaxis at all.

She paused. ‘Not like we did.’

‘Leen …’ I didn’t mean it to come out as a warning, but maybe it did, because she stopped, shook her head. ‘I’m fine. And we’re all good. Really.’

Her eyes flicked up and down my face, made me itchy.

‘Anyway,’ she said, glancing past me, ‘I know I’m getting married and that usually means dropping off the planet, but I really hope … I want us to do this together. I need you, Caitie.’

I raised an eyebrow, steadied my breath. ‘For what?’

‘I need you to keep me from going mad.’ She laughed. ‘And if I turn into a bridezilla and start demanding ice sculptures, I need you to shoot me, yeah?’