I looked at my food, trying to find a place to start. My stomach was churning but my throat was tight, my mouth full of acid.

‘Everything okay, Caitie?’ Dad asked.

When I glanced at him his expression was odd, and I nodded. ‘Of course.’ I picked up my fork and stabbed a mushroom, forced my spine to straighten. ‘It’s really exciting. I can’t wait.’

‘So has she asked you yet?’ Mum asked, pouring milk into her granola.

I paused, the mushroom dangling in mid-air. ‘Asked me what?’

‘You know! Maid of honour.’

I frowned. ‘I don’t think—’

‘Don’t be silly,’ Mum said. Her face was all lit up, her eyes too wide open, hard to look at. ‘Of course she’s going to ask you. You’ve been best friends for years.’

I put the mushroom in my mouth and chewed it forcefully, understanding for the first time why some people hated them so much. It felt like eating my own toes, still attached.

‘Maybe,’ I said, shrugging.

‘Caitlin.’ Mum’s voice sounded like a warning.

‘What?’ Another mushroom. This one oozed dirty water onto my tongue and I nearly gagged, wondering what kinds of bacteria it was harbouring.

‘I don’t know what happened between you two, but after everything you’ve been through together, you could at least—’

‘Nothing happened.’ I didn’t want to think about everything we’d been through together. All that ancient history. ‘It’s fine. We’re fine. We’ve just both been busy, that’s all.’

When I looked up Dad was still watching me and it made me uncomfortable, awkward. Over the noise of the cafe I heard a siren, and I wondered where it was coming from, where it was going.

‘It’s so exciting,’ Mum said again. ‘Jenny is thrilled.’

I forced a smile at the mention of Lina’s mum. ‘How is she?’

‘Good,’ Mum said. ‘We’re having dinner there tomorrow. They’re buying a property in the Southern Highlands, now that Colin’s retiring.’

‘Oh?’

Mum nodded. ‘She’s so lucky to have him, isn’t she? Especially after everything. She’s not big on marriage, as you can probably imagine, but she’s thrilled for Lina.’

I liked Jenny. I always had. When Lina had first moved in next door, I’d been around there all the time—with Lina, of course, but also because I liked Jenny. She was so different from my mum, not interested in the kinds of things my mum cared about: whether the P&C should hold a trivia night and whether the cutlery all matched at dinner. Jenny had no patience for any of that—their cutlery never matched—and I’d liked that.

‘Matt’s a sweetheart, isn’t he?’