Chapters (75)
- Cover
- Praise
- About the Author
- Title Page
- Intoroduction
- ONE
- TWO
- THREE
- FOUR
- FIVE
- SIX
- SEVEN
- EITHT
- NINE
- TEN
- ELEVEN
- TWELVE
- THIRTEEN
- FOURTEEN
- FIFTEEN
- SIXTEEN
- SEVENTEEN
- EIGHTEEN
- NINETEEN
- TWENTY
- TWENTY-ONE
- TWENTY-TWO
- TWENTY-THREE
- TWENTY-FOUR
- TWENTY-FIVE
- TWENTY-SIX
- TWENTY-SEVEN
- TWENTY-EIGHT
- TWENTY-NINE
- THIRTY
- THIRTY-ONE
- THIRTY-TWO
- THIRTY-THREE
- THIRTY-FOUR
- THIRTY-FIVE
- THIRTY-SIX
- THIRTY-SEVEN
- THIRTY-EIGHT
- THIRTY-NINE
- FORTY
- FORTY-ONE
- FORTY-TWO
- FORTY-THREE
- FORTY-FOUR
- FORTY-FIVE
- FORTY-SIX
- FORTY-SEVEN
- FORTY-EIGHT
- FORTY-NINE
- FIFTY
- FIFTY-ONE
- FIFTY-TWO
- FIFTY-THREE
- FIFTY-FOUR
- FIFTY-FIVE
- FIFTY-SIX
- FIFTY-SEVEN
- FIFTY-EIGHT
- FIFTY-NINE
- SIXTY
- SIXTY-ONE
- SIXTY-TWO
- SIXTY-THREE
- SIXTY-FOUR
- SIXTY-FIVE
- SIXTY-SIX
- SIXTY-SEVEN
- ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
- CLIMATE EMERGENCY
- Copyright
I’m powering homeward, hands pushing against the stitches in my coat pocket. I understand why what happened had to happen, and I’m amused on one level at how easily I managed to slip through Miss Amber’s net. But there’s still a sense of being wronged – by Alan and Vince, by the school, by everything else – that’s smoking like a small bonfire in my chest. Not quite the anger of a few days ago, but it’s not like it’s nothing either.
Jamie has to put a hand on my shoulder to slow me down, and I wheel around. A couple of younger students almost walk into us as we stop, abruptly, in the middle of the pavement. I glare at them, my eyes spitting sparks as they speed off up the street.
‘What?’ I demand.
‘Jeez, Josh. What’s the problem with you at the moment? First Monday, then English yesterday after turning up in some weird mood, and now this lunchtime thing? How’s your nose? It looks…’
Over Jamie’s shoulder, I see Ahmed getting into the back of what must be his mum’s car, pulled into the side of the road. A white BMW 4x4, quite new. It looks familiar. Then it clicks. It’s the car from the video. The red paint has been completely removed.
‘Josh? Are you listening? What’s the matter?’
‘Nothing. Leave it.’
‘No. I’m worried about you, and I get the feeling you’re about to blow up or something.’
‘What, like “explode”? Great joke.’ It doesn’t feel like me speaking anymore.
‘You know that’s not what I meant.’
What I don’t need right now, what I really don’t need, is someone calm, concerned and loyal. Someone like Jamie. I want to be angry. I want the feeling I’ve enjoyed for the last few days to come back. The smouldering bonfire is growing by the second. I fan the flames. Every time I open my mouth, I belch out great clouds of black smoke. I want people to choke on them, to struggle to breathe.
But Jamie just stands there, unaffected. Which is worse.
‘Leave me alone, Jamie.’ I jut my chin over his shoulder, towards the BMW that has now rejoined the crawl of parent traffic along the main road. ‘Go back to your—’
‘What?’ Jamie interrupts me. Deep down, the part of me that isn’t fire is glad he does. So glad. ‘Go back to my what?’
I stare at him. I want the fire to pass on to him, to set his hair alight. ‘You know.’
‘No, I don’t. And I don’t think you know either.’ He pauses for a second. His eyes soften. ‘What happened this weekend? We missed you at the rec. It was great when you came last week. Everyone said so. What did you do?’