Chapters (70)
- COVER PAGE
- ABOUT THE AUTHOR
- DEDICATION
- PROLOGUE
- PART I BIRTH
- ONE
- TWO
- THREE
- FOUR
- FIVE
- SIX
- SEVEN
- EIGHT
- NINE
- TEN
- ELEVEN
- TWELVE
- THIRTEEN
- FOURTEEN
- FIFTEEN
- PART II LIFE
- SIXTEEN
- SEVENTEEN
- EIGHTEEN
- NINETEEN
- TWENTY
- TWENTY-ONE
- TWENTY-TWO
- TWENTY-THREE
- TWENTY-FOUR
- TWENTY-FIVE
- TWENTY-SIX
- TWENTY-SEVEN
- TWENTY-EIGHT
- TWENTY-NINE
- THIRTY
- THIRTY-ONE
- THIRTY-TWO
- THIRTY-THREE
- THIRTY-FOUR
- PART III DEATH
- THIRTY-FIVE
- THIRTY-SIX
- THIRTY-SEVEN
- THIRTY-EIGHT
- THIRTY-NINE
- FORTY
- FORTY-ONE
- FORTY-TWO
- FORTY-THREE
- FORTY-FOUR
- FORTY-FIVE
- FORTY-SIX
- FORTY-SEVEN
- FORTY-EIGHT
- FORTY-NINE
- FIFTY
- FIFTY-ONE
- FIFTY-TWO
- FIFTY-THREE
- FIFTY-FOUR
- FIFTY-FIVE
- FIFTY-SIX
- FIFTY-SEVEN
- FIFTY-EIGHT
- FIFTY-NINE
- SIXTY
- EPILOGUE
- AUTHOR’S NOTE
- ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
‘She was really drunk,’ Max says by way of explanation. ‘I just helped her into the bathroom so she could be sick.’ He grins. ‘What did you guys think I was doing?’
‘Apparently you were engaging in a sexual act,’ I inform him, bending over to check if the intern is all right.
‘Wrong gender, mate,’ Max says.
‘So only sexual acts with a human possessing your genitals of your choice, then?’
‘I was about to,’ he admits, looking sheepish, ‘but then this girl burst in and started vomiting everywhere and it sort of killed the mood, you know.’
Winnie looks down at our vomiting colleague, and nods. ‘I can see that.’
Dr Vomit puts her head up, and purges all over my shoes. ‘Sorry,’ she groans. ‘I’m so sorry.’
‘It’s okay,’ I say. ‘I actually hate these shoes.’
‘I’ll get you some water,’ Winnie says. ‘Kitty, maybe you should go wash your shoes under the hose.’
‘Do you like being an intern, Kitty?’ Dr Vomit suddenly asks, surprising me by knowing my name, as she grabs onto my arm and looks up at me with half-closed eyes. ‘Like, do you really?’
‘I don’t know,’ I reply, semi-honestly.
‘I hate it,’ she says, putting her head back onto the tiles. ‘I really hate it. The thought of doing this for another year makes me seriously want to top myself.’
‘Don’t say that,’ I say, alarmed.
She shrugs into the tiles. ‘Nah, I don’t mean it. I’ve just smoked so much pot tonight.’ She stops talking and lifts her head off the ground to vomit again. It pours out, like lava from a volcano.
‘You’ll feel better after a bit of a purge,’ I tell her.
‘Shouldn’t mix weed and booze,’ Max says, with the air of doctorly and regular pot-smoking authority. ‘You’ll be vomming for hours.’
I prise her hand off my arm and leave Winnie to deal with the situation. Walking into the backyard to find the hose, I realise I am very drunk, and close my eyes. I lean against the fence and let my back slide down until I am sitting on the ground.
Do you like being an intern?
I hate it. I really hate it.
The thought of doing this for another year makes me seriously want to top myself.
I rest my head against the wooden fence and take a breath.
It’s just a party, I tell myself, a stupid fucking party. People say stupid things when they’re drunk at parties. We’re doctors. We’re fucking sensible and kind and caring doctors. We’re allowed to get drunk and lose control now and then, aren’t we? How else do you cope?
People say stupid things when they’re drunk at parties.