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Back Going Under Save as PDF
Chapters (70)
  1. COVER PAGE
  2. ABOUT THE AUTHOR
  3. DEDICATION
  4. PROLOGUE
  5. PART I BIRTH
  6. ONE
  7. TWO
  8. THREE
  9. FOUR
  10. FIVE
  11. SIX
  12. SEVEN
  13. EIGHT
  14. NINE
  15. TEN
  16. ELEVEN
  17. TWELVE
  18. THIRTEEN
  19. FOURTEEN
  20. FIFTEEN
  21. PART II LIFE
  22. SIXTEEN
  23. SEVENTEEN
  24. EIGHTEEN
  25. NINETEEN
  26. TWENTY
  27. TWENTY-ONE
  28. TWENTY-TWO
  29. TWENTY-THREE
  30. TWENTY-FOUR
  31. TWENTY-FIVE
  32. TWENTY-SIX
  33. TWENTY-SEVEN
  34. TWENTY-EIGHT
  35. TWENTY-NINE
  36. THIRTY
  37. THIRTY-ONE
  38. THIRTY-TWO
  39. THIRTY-THREE
  40. THIRTY-FOUR
  41. PART III DEATH
  42. THIRTY-FIVE
  43. THIRTY-SIX
  44. THIRTY-SEVEN
  45. THIRTY-EIGHT
  46. THIRTY-NINE
  47. FORTY
  48. FORTY-ONE
  49. FORTY-TWO
  50. FORTY-THREE
  51. FORTY-FOUR
  52. FORTY-FIVE
  53. FORTY-SIX
  54. FORTY-SEVEN
  55. FORTY-EIGHT
  56. FORTY-NINE
  57. FIFTY
  58. FIFTY-ONE
  59. FIFTY-TWO
  60. FIFTY-THREE
  61. FIFTY-FOUR
  62. FIFTY-FIVE
  63. FIFTY-SIX
  64. FIFTY-SEVEN
  65. FIFTY-EIGHT
  66. FIFTY-NINE
  67. SIXTY
  68. EPILOGUE
  69. AUTHOR’S NOTE
  70. ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

This is the best idea I’ve heard in years. ‘YES!’ I shout. ‘PACE CALL NOW!’

The hospital’s PACE team is called whenever a patient starts deteriorating. In this instance, they arrive promptly, to my overwhelming relief. Not surprisingly, the medical registrar comes over to ask where the treating team is.

‘Ah, that’d be me,’ I admit, feeling a bit queasy. I’m hiding behind the desk, still trying to work out how to order the CT scan.

At this point the Joker has been informed of the situation by the Shark, but instead of coming to my rescue he has been texting me instructions.

The medical registrar is disgusted. ‘Tell your team to get here now,’ he snaps. Then, seeing my look of uncertainty, he rolls his eyes. ‘Oh, for God’s sake, give me the phone and I’ll ring them.’

‘Good luck.’

As I could have predicted, the Joker tells him to bugger off.

By now Mr Waters has stopped breathing anyway so it’s escalated to a code blue. As he is taken away by the intensive care doctors, Sally and I stand next to each other.

‘Thanks,’ she whispers, still sounding terrified. I’ve no idea why she’s thanking me. If anything, I feel like I should be thanking her.

All I can think is that I want to go home but my work here isn’t done. I sprint all over the hospital, trying desperately to organise an operating theatre to save Mr Waters. The Shark ends up performing emergency surgery.

Mr Waters finally makes it to theatre, but I’m thoroughly shaken up. I return to the ward and stand there for a moment, trying to process what just happened.

My phone buzzes with a message. It’s from the Smiling Assassin.

Could you get me a coffee? You didn’t bother showing so I’m in theatre 6 assisting Prince.

The realisation that the Smiling Assassin has taken my spot next to Dr Prince in the operating theatre while I was caught up in the Waters drama hits me like a sharp knee to the gut.

I pull off my scrub cap and blink hard. Pull yourself together, I tell myself fiercely. It’s just one theatre list. You’re on a surgical term. There are heaps of theatre lists.

A lone tear betrays me and tracks down my face. I use the cap to wipe it away, then walk quickly to the patient toilet on the ward. I shut the door, turn on the tap and splash my face with water. Then I go to the cafeteria to buy the Smiling Assassin a coffee, feeling ridiculously sad.