He had a car and a swimming pool. He had a gun and a telescope. He had a patio and two Japanese kids by a previous marriage what Mellers ended up looking after while he was in various meetings about his parole.

The 2 kids (one 12 and one 16) spoke a kind of street Japanese that was a long way from the business class Japanish that Mellers had learned back at school. Anyhow, it was all exhausting and one night (after putting kids to bed) Mellers fell into a dozy sleep on the couch. Imagine this – the TV was on, playing one of those olde shows that ‘everyone’ loves and the patio door was open, a faint breeze stirring the windmills of her mind (?) . . . weird music played . . .

*

As Mellers slept so sweetly the gods in ‘heaven’ looked down and saw her and cried. Leia, Thor, Hand-Job, Trumpton and Asparagus took pity on her and sent down their winged messenger called Dumbo.

Fear not sed Dumbo, when Mellers woke up in a mighty dread, I am here to help you or so the legend goes . . .

Mellers was ‘all scared’ but soon adjusted to what was happening and even turned the TV down so she could hear properly. Dumbo lent Mellers her magic wings so she could fly across the world, visiting her mother and wrecking vengeance on Vortex.

*

First port of call.

In ‘freezer world’ Mellers stayed a long time with her mum, learning the old ways and sitting by the camping gaz campfire till dawn, singing songs and doing the actions that go with them.

Mellers and Leia in the woods, laughing, stalking real deer ©.

Mellers learning ITV magic, a book by Penn and Teller in one hand and a corpse of a rabbit in the other.

Mellers in a pub in Helsinki, telling jokes and falling drunk to the floor, dreaming of the gods agen, walking hand in hand with them and all crap like that.

*

Mellers comes flying into Vortex’s new place in Berlin sporting Dumbo’s wings and a hammer what she’s borrowed from Thor.

SMASH! goes his skull. KERRASSHHHH! goes his knees. KERR-SNAP! goes his kneck.

SHHHCCLUUP! goes his eyes popping out of his ‘head’.

Ha, ha, ha, ha goes Mellers and all the gods in heaven.

*

Mud is a good and necessary thing. It makes the gutters be what they are and the basements of old buildings more interesting. Without mud the world would be a emptier and less enjoyable place.

Kelly

Kelly

Kelly’s dad had an apple to stand in for his patience and if she or 1 (one) of her many naughty brothers broke 1 (one) of the rules he would take a bite from that apple and simply swallow it, repressing his anger and right to retribution, saying nothing and ‘staying his hand’ ©.