Taxi Driver

a strange tale from endland (sic)

There once was an obstreperous Greek taxi driver called Antagonistes.

He was a man who lived in the dark of Endland (sic) and was known to drink first and ask questions later. That bloke had piss stains on his trousers and bean gravy on his shirt. He wore his hair loose in one of them flamenco type hair-cuts and his belt had a buckle what looked like a skull and cross bones. He often went down discos at the Roxy but of dancing he did not care to do much only The Head Butt and The Stairwell. The Bouncers feared and ‘respected him as an equal’ © and if Taggy (short for Antagonistes) got in a fight they always stood back and let him bloody well get on with it.

It was in 1973, just after the winter, and just before the troops came back and killed everyone they hadn’t killed the first time they came around.

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One nite Taggy (short for Antagonistes) were working a late-shift in the taxi and at 3 in the morning things were too quiet for him my friend and he stopped off at Kev’s Kebab Kastle near the large fountain and had one kebab.

It all looked like it was going to pass off without incident when a couple of leggy blonde girls turned up and were the immediate object of A’s unwanted attention including dropping his mustard squirter, wolf-whistles and various unnecessary comments about their body-parts. The girls gev as good as they got, as was to be expected, soon delivering unto Taggy a rite mouthful on the topic of minding his own business, keeping his oar out of things, holding his tongue, and keeping his opinions on matters that did not concern him to himself. Before long a crowd had gathered, drawn to the trouble like street rats to turned over wheelie bins, and an altercation was soon in progress about who said what to whom, and who should shut up and who should fuck right off. After some standard early weekend pushing and shoving, a bunch of lads grabbed Taggy, announced that their ‘Greek friend was in deep deep shit’, bundled him into their Maestro and drunk-drove him away.

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When Antagonistes woke up he was chained to a rock behind Ladbrookes at Meadowhead, with his tummy exposed and a couple of eagles were eating away at his liver. Each morning his liver re-grew and each nite the bastard eagles came to eat it out again. The pain was excruciating and all Taggy’s cries for help were to no avail.

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