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Chapters (38)
  1. Cover
  2. Also By Daniel Kraus
  3. Title Page
  4. Copyright
  5. Dedication
  6. Money
  7. Supermilk
  8. Bugs
  9. My Wiener
  10. Gwendolyn
  11. Midget
  12. Walgreen
  13. Dick Trickle
  14. Scrapbook
  15. Apples
  16. Dag
  17. Love
  18. My Wiener Part 2: The Two Towers
  19. Moms
  20. Phone Call
  21. Phone Call 2
  22. Punch
  23. Robbie
  24. Natural Light
  25. Flypaper
  26. Kyle
  27. Queen
  28. Fam
  29. Dragon
  30. Walgreen 2
  31. Dick Trickle 2
  32. Feast
  33. Shower
  34. Music
  35. The Fly
  36. My Wiener Part 3: The Return of the King
  37. Mrs F
  38. Ghosts

Stay away forever,

Robbie

Dragon

Dragon

Might snow after all. Trip to Walgreens cold as hell. Jean jacket isnt cutting it. I take me a sec to zip my zipper high and I peep three children done up like space dudes jumping over a gutter and piling themself in a car with two duck tape windows. I know exactly what those space dudes are up to. Back when Moms was mobile we did the same thing. Yellow Street candies suck balls. You want candies that dont suck balls, you get your ass drove to a hood thats got tall gates and good lawns. The ladies there do trick or treat like theyre in a contest. I used to get sparkle pouches full a incredible loot like candies with french on it or gold foil or salt which I know sounds foul but, robocop, hear me out, cuz salt on candies is sick.

* * *

Plenty a Yellow Street kids dont have wheels though so I expect words gonna travel fast Robbies passing out high quality treats. Thats what Im pondering when I spot Deformo a couple blocks away shuffling his deformed ass in my direction, probably after food but more likely to supply my punk brain gruesome nightmares forever. So I swerve hard on Dawson Ave and thats when boom I see Dag.

* * *

I stop sudden. Dags supposed to be home learning lesbian music with Piano Lady. But there she is, chilling in front of the grocery with the upside down carts and busted ass lottery signs. She hasnt changed clothes or nothing. Still wearing the red jacket with the zippers, still got scabs on her knuckles where she boxed Robbies light switch.

* * *

Dag was in a mood last time I saw her so I oughta walk by quiet. But its Dag! I wave my arms like a fool and just about yell <How you living, my ho?> but then I remember this is where we spied Gwendolyn this morning. Is Dag chasing that dog by herself? Whats up with that secretive sharkweek? She hasnt done that before. Or, dang, maybe she has. Maybe she does it regular. Maybe I dont know Dag so good after all. Theres a Christmas tree ornament on the cement thats still got a gummy price tag and I crunch it with my snowboot. Christmas? Nope. Christmas is never coming. Its gonna be Halloween forever.

* * *