Since as I said this is only the 3rd letter I ever hand wrote my hand is cramping up like the tarantulas I bought last week to get over you & ended up having to murder. But I want to say one more thing. After I first met Jody playing in my front yard his mom invited me to his birthday party & I was Proud to go. I sold some junk to pay my water bill so I could shower before I attended & even though the party was all little kids in birthday hats which I’m sure makes you say I’m a Dirty Pedo, it made me So Happy. There were white kids & black kids & Asian kids & Middle East kids & Jody’s mom said she was especially glad I was Jody’s friend & I had to eat my birthday cake by the dumpster so no one could see my Tears of Joy.

Jody’s mom is sick now with Jody won’t say what, but I’ll tell you Here & Now she’s twice the woman you are Little Lamb. The second she saw me even though I’ve gotten fatter she knew who I was & the Violence in my past & still gave me a big hug & didn’t call me a Life Ruiner like you did. That doesn’t mean I don’t know how I ruined Coach S’s life. Trust me I know it!!! But you saw my Scrapbook & although you laughed so hard you sprayed eggs on it you saw the whole truth. Yes a Life Ruiner is one of the things I am, but does it have to be the Only Thing? I’m asking you does it? I know you don’t like football but did you ever see the Very Famous Monday Night Football video of Joe Theismann’s broken leg or the videos of Dennis Byrd or EJ Henderson or Marc Mariani? Back when I had internet I watched those videos All The Time to see athletes at The Top Of Their Game lose Everything from Catastrophic Injury. Maybe it sounds morbid but it made me feel like I wasn’t Alone, like I just had my Catastrophic Injury a little earlier than they did.

Who knows maybe you’re right about everything Little Lamb. Maybe Me & Jody & Midget & Dag don’t deserve your Respect. But if that’s true it’s not bc we were born evil. Its bc we spent too much time on Yellow Street where Poison is everywhere & the immunity you build up fades away eventually & it’s like my concussions where you can’t see right anymore & can’t hear right anymore & Do Not Know What You’re Doing Anymore & the Poison leaks back out of you like sweat or piss or what didn’t come out of me when we had our Terrible Sex.

If I’m a Life Ruiner Little Lamb it’s my own life I’m ruining & no one can stop me.