The way he stumbles over his words tells me he is struggling with being separated from Kins. I leave him with his thoughts, he doesn’t need my smart-ass comments pissing him off. The GPS loads and reroutes us to home, taking us back the way we came.

Glancing sideways at Tanner, he huffs. “It’s only been three fucking days!” He throws his arms wide. “Have you ever gone that long without contact from her?”

I stay quiet, revving the engine and doing a U-turn. If I’m honest, I don’t think I have gone more than a day without some form of communication with her. He’s a more patient man than I am.

Chapter Thirty-Four

Kinsley

Resting my hands on my knees, I lean forward, welcoming the cool morning breeze against the back of my neck. I glance down at my smart watch trying to catch my breath, a new personal best flashes on the screen – 36 mins/5.2km. I smile with a sense of accomplishment before the reality of why I’m pushing myself so hard smacks me in the face.

It’s been three days since Tanner discovered the truth of my past and only today has Jesse left me alone for more than a few hours at a time. He stayed by my side for the first forty-eight hours; I know he was concerned for my well being and I don’t blame him. My track record in the mental health department isn’t great. But come this morning, I needed my own space, I practically begged him to leave me alone. Leave the poor ‘self inflicted, yet broken hearted’ girl alone, Jesse.

At one point there, I wondered if I had made a mistake. But we quickly squashed that thought, didn’t we Kinsley? Ugh, clearly the exercise isn’t helping to rid the little extra voices in my head. I don’t mind them being there most days, but sometimes, when they turn dark, they creep out like shadows, climbing the walls and towering over me. They make me feel small, and I find myself crouching in the dark corners of my mind, pulling my knees tight to my chest. These voices dictate my thoughts and manipulate my feelings, it’s almost as though I am being buried alive; trapped with no way out. It’s suffocating.

Despite the little voices taunting me I shake them off, the endorphins still pumping through my veins manage to keep me afloat. I bound up the steps, taking them two at a time. Opting for a red bull from the fridge rather than a bottle of water, it’s not like I’m exercising for my health after all.