Chapters (81)
- Cover
- Dedication
- Prologue
- Chapter One
- Chapter Two
- Chapter Three
- Chapter Four
- Chapter Five
- Chapter Six
- Chapter Seven
- Chapter Eight
- Chapter Nine
- Chapter Ten
- Chapter Eleven
- Chapter Twelve
- Chapter Thirteen
- Chapter Fourteen
- Chapter Fifteen
- Chapter Sixteen
- Chapter Seventeen
- Chapter Eighteen
- Chapter Nineteen
- Chapter Twenty
- Chapter Twenty-One
- Chapter Twenty-Two
- Chapter Twenty-Three
- Chapter Twenty-Four
- Chapter Twenty-Five
- Chapter Twenty-Six
- Chapter Twenty-Seven
- Chapter Twenty-Eight
- Chapter Twenty-Nine
- Chapter Thirty
- Chapter Thirty-One
- Chapter Thirty-Two
- Chapter Thirty-Three
- Chapter Thirty-Four
- Chapter Thirty-Five
- Chapter Thirty-Six
- Chapter Thirty-Seven
- Chapter Thirty-Eight
- Chapter Thirty-Nine
- Chapter Forty
- Chapter Forty-One
- Chapter Forty-Two
- Chapter Forty-Three
- Chapter Forty-Four
- Chapter Forty-Five
- Chapter Forty-Six
- Chapter Forty-Seven
- Chapter Forty-Eight
- Chapter Forty-Nine
- Chapter Fifty
- Chapter Fifty-One
- Chapter Fifty-Two
- Chapter Fifty-Three
- Chapter Fifty-Four
- Chapter Fifty-Five
- Chapter Fifty-Six
- Chapter Fifty-Seven
- Chapter Fifty-Eight
- Chapter Fifty-Nine
- Chapter Sixty
- Chapter Sixty-One
- Chapter Sixty-Two
- Chapter Sixty-Three
- Chapter Sixty-Four
- Chapter Sixty-Five
- Chapter Sixty-Six
- Chapter Sixty-Seven
- Chapter Sixty-Eight
- Chapter Sixty-Nine
- Chapter Seventy
- Chapter Seventy-One
- Chapter Seventy-Two
- Chapter Seventy-Three
- Chapter Seventy-Four
- A Letter From Ruby
- Acknowledgements
- About the Author
- Also by Ruby Speechley
‘Shut up,’ Max yells.
He turns to Maddy, gripping her arms now, pinching the flesh away from her bones. ‘You need to tell me where our baby is, Maddy. Do you hear me?’ He shakes her and her head sways back and forth, clicking and crunching, her eyes opening and shutting like a doll.
The baby is crying again. The sound seems to inhabit the whole house, reverberating like a tight violin string. She aches to hold her baby boy. A kaleidoscope of images spins in her head. A telephone ringing and Emily face down in the bath water. Chloe singing to an audience and finding her dead. The faces of her father, mother and Lisa, the identical wallpaper and the photo of Max with another family. Seeing Alison pregnant and picturing Max falling from a bridge and her baby not kicking, all going around and around and around.
She sinks to her knees, rocking her empty cradling arms. ‘He stopped moving and kicking and they said he was dead inside me and I don’t know why I was carrying a dead baby, is that what I deserved? And they made me take a pill to get rid of him and there was so much blood for days and I waited for you to come home to tell you, but you were missing and I needed to tell my husband first, but I thought you died falling from a bridge and I just needed to tell you that I’d called him Sam and that it wasn’t our fault; the doctors said it wasn’t my fault. But Sam was in the hospital cot waiting for me and it was Chloe who brought him back for us as a gift.’
‘I’m so sorry our baby died and I wasn’t there.’ Max crouches in front of her.
‘What the fuck are you telling me here?’ Alison pulls at Max’s arm.
‘Shut up,’ Max snarls, yanking away from her.
‘Who is this woman?’ Alison’s accusing blister-red face is more than Maddy can stand.
‘I’m his wife,’ Maddy yells.
‘You fucking bastard!’ Alison thumps Max in the back.
Maddy tries to grab Sam, but Alison twists away and elbows her in the face.
‘I’ve got to save my boy.’ Maddy lunges again, but Alison is too quick, turning away and kicking out behind her.
‘See, he never changed, he’s not worth your breath.’ The man muscles forward and head-butts Max square on the forehead.
‘Fuck off, Ray, if it wasn’t for you and your scum of a father lying to me…’ Blood drips down Max’s face. As Ray turns away, Max surprises him with an uppercut that sends him crashing backwards. Alison screams. The sound of a siren approaching fills the air.
‘We were just trying to protect Ali from your lies.’ Ray holds his jaw, giving Alison a sideways glance.