This one raw old black dude is the Walgreener we hate most and of course hes working the register. Dag and me call him Dick Trickle cuz one time Dag saw that name in the Walgreen newspaper rack. Dick Trickles bony like hes whittled from a stick and he has a bunch a old ass ties and thick ass glasses and a balding ass old man fro. Hes mean as a wasp. The cashier we were hoping for is this white bitch with bionic arm canes thats blind as hell. Usually I ask a complicated question about the products they stack up front like the Slanket or the Lint Lizard or the Ahh Bra and meantime Dag sneaks around and loads up on cigs. But you cant steal nothing off Dick Trickle. Robocop boxes you out like hes Dwight Howard.

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Dick Trickle hates it when three youths come in simultaneous and hes got his beady eyes all over our asses. I get Dag to hand me Robbies chip and I wave that paper like a pimp. See this green? Im gonna buy all your candies, homes! Dick Trickle just shakes his old ass head like we stole the bills straight from his register. Whatever, man. Go back to policing your stupid smokes.

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First thing Dag always does is browse the beautiful papers for people to write letters. They have designs like flowers and blue skies and a dog sitting his dog ass on a beautiful beach. Dags sister Lotte doesnt have real internet in the nuthouse, so Dag writes letters old school and she likes them to look pretty so Lotte has pretty things to enjoy. Dag says in the psych ward the only TV and books they have are inspirational. I asked how about magazines and she said the only magazine they have is Oprah magazine. Dag says she writes to Lotte about me and Midget and all our adventures. It makes me so proud I can hardly explain it.

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But this isnt the time to be purchasing beautiful papers. No doubt Robbies filling Yellow Street with cuss words cuz a how late we are with his candies. But hold up. Oh, hell yes! Theres a whole aisle a Halloween masks, and Im sorry Robbie but masks this fine have got to be worn! Even though tonights Halloween Walgreens still got a nice big selection, probably cuz nobody comes to this crap ass Walgreen except when they need a jimmy hat or rash cream or something else real immediate.

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