Tanner asked me to trust him and even after everything I said and did, I do. He has never shown me any reason not to, yet I can’t help but feel nauseous at the unknown. My stomach flips as I rush down the stairs to where Tanner is waiting. He jerks his chin towards the door and without a word I follow him out and into the car.

The silence begins to eat away at me. “Tanner –” I try to gently coax something out of him, but he is too quick; he opens his eyes and straightens in his seat, putting the car into gear and pressing his foot flat to the floor. The speed gives me a hit of adrenaline, which almost makes me giggle. Time and place, Kinsley. It’s not the right time to be laughing.

“I’m trying here, Kinsley, just let me get my head on straight. Please.”

Seeing Tanner this way, so out of control and openly emotional, only heightens my feelings of anxiety. Little voices in my head are screaming at me, coming at me from different angles, all saying different things. Apologise to him. Ask him why he walked away. Tell him you regret it. Has he been in communication with Jesse this whole time? Silly silly girl.

“I’m going to need you to listen to me. You’re going to feel every emotion under the sun when you hear what I have to say, and I will give you a chance to feel them all and express them in whatever way you need to, but right now I need you to just listen and not interrupt me.” He looks across at me and I try to force a smile to acknowledge him, but it’s more a twitch of my lips if anything.

He sighs, looking back at the road ahead of us, speeding through a red light and exiting onto the freeway. “Jesse went after Lance,” he blurts out.

Hesitantly, I speak even though he told me not to. “I feel like you might need to backtrack a little, Tanner. Can you start from the beginning?”

“The day before you found me in your spare room, Jesse had told me everything.” He pauses, glancing my way. “He told me about your brother, your dad and your mum. He told me what he and Kyle found when they were kids and what happened the night Kyle passed away. I decided that if you weren’t going to tell me yourself, I would put myself in a position where you had to.” Tanner’s knuckles turn white as he tightens his grip on the steering wheel.